Computer Errors
Message: "Press Any Key"
Actual meaning: "Press any key you like but I'm not moving."
Message: "Fatal Error. Please contact technical support quoting error now. 1A4-2546512430E"
Actual meaning: "... where you will be kept on hold for 10 minutes, only to be told that it's a hardware problem."
Message: "Installing program to C:\...."
Actual meaning: "... And I'll also be writing a few files into c:\windows and c:\windows\system where you'll NEVER find them."
Message: "Please insert disk 11"
Actual meaning: "Because I know darn well there are only 10 disks."
Message: "Not enough memory"
Actual meaning: "I don't CARE if you've got 64MB of RAM, I want to use the bit below 640K."
Message: "Cannot read from drive D:...."
Actual meaning: "... However, if you put the CD in right side up..."
Message: "Please Wait...."
Actual meaning: "... Indefinitely."
Message: "Directory does not exist...."
Actual meaning: ".... any more. Whoops."
Message: "The application caused an error. Choose Ignore or Close."
Actual meaning: "....Makes no difference to me, you're still not getting your work back."
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Before ending this, here's a joke that you may have heard but it made me laugh.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
- Don't be ridiculous. Thats a hardware problem!