1. THE NAKED WIFE.
A man is getting into the shower, just as his wife is getting out of it. The door-bell rings, and the wife quickly wraps a towel round her, and goes to answer it. It's Bob, the next door neighbor. He looks at her and says, "I'll give you $800/ if you drop that towel!"
She hesitates for a moment, then drops the towel. Bob gives her $800/, and leaves.
When she gets back, her husband asks who it was. It was Bob she tells him.
"Did he say anything about the $800/- he borrowed from me?" her husband asks.
Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your share-holders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure
2. THE PRIEST AND THE NUN
A nun requests a lift from a priest in his car. On the way, the nun crosses her legs in such a way as to expose a shapely knee. The priest narrowly avoids having an accident; he cannot resist, and puts his hand on her knee. "Remember psalm 129, father!" the nun says to him. Blushing, the priest takes his hand away, mumbling something about the flesh being weak. A little further on, he notices that the nun now has a little bit of thigh exposed too! His hand is drawn like a magnet to it. The Nun again tells him to remember psalm 129, and the priest withdraws his hand. They reach their destination, and the Nun is dropped off at her convent. The priest rushes to the church, and opens psalm 129: " Go forth and seek, further up you will find glory!" it says.....
Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity
3. THE POWER OF CHARISMA
A bull and a turkey are in conversation. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey."But I haven't got the energy."
"I've heard it said that my droppings are full of energy, and give a turbo boost to many that use it," says the bull. "Why dont you try some?" So, the turkey partakes some of the bulls droppings, and tries to get up the tree. He only manages to get to the lower branches. "That's not so bad," says the bull, "try some more." And sure enough, this time the turkey is able to get a little bit higher, but still not quite to the top. The bull urges him to try more of his dung, and this time the turkey gets right to the top of the tree! And there he sits proudly, surveying the world underneath!
A farmer emerges from his house, and spotting the turkey perched on the tree-top, rushes back in. He gets his shot gun, and blasts the turkey out of the tree.
Moral of the story: Bullsh*t might get you to the top, but it cant keep you there.
