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I would like to know more about how do we people differentiate between what is right and what do we actually want... please lets try to be stright forward about it folks .. and please.. lets make abstract.

Head and Heart decisions - one of the main trials in life that gives every one of us problems sometime in life my friend.

And one one the most difficult in life we usually have to solve ourselves

Intimacy wrote:I would like to know more about how do we people differentiate between what is right and what do we actually want... please lets try to be stright forward about it folks .. and please.. lets make abstract.

I think that you should always know what you want in life, but it should be tempered by what is right. Basically, are there harmful consequences, does it break the golden rule of "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."? If yes, then you need to act with conscience rather than just desire.

if your conscience pulls you back from doing something..there must be something wrong you are doing...

otherwise.. if you really want to know what is right and what is wrong..
you ask yourself..

... is this good for me, my family, my friends and the society as a whole

... is this coming in the way of the physical, social, intellectual and spiritual upliftment of anybody including myself.


in short, try to live a life without pain fear or guilt...you will be on the right track...

cheers..

It is frightening, but a small portion of the population are actually psychopaths (no, they don't have to kill people to be considered psychopaths). These people are incapable of following their conscience because they don't have one. More interesting info here - http://www.crisiscounseling.com/Articles/Psychopath.htm and here http://faculty.ncwc.edu/toconnor/428/428lect16.htm

I have known at least one psychopath - he was a real piece of work. It took a whole group of us months to figure out that this guy just wasn't what he seemed. One of my family members might be, and most likely it was due to a brian injury when he was a teen. He's a real piece of work too.

Sorry Intimacy, am I off track?

kanelli wrote:One of my family members might be, and most likely it was due to a brian injury when he was a teen.

Why did this Brian guy injure him???

It was a typo Liban

meant to be "brain"

I differentiate between what is right and what i actually want by following the rules of the Baz Luhrman 'Everybody's Free' song...

...Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you
imagine.....

....Do one thing everyday that scares you Sing Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
people who are reckless with yours. Floss Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes
you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with
yourself. ...

Etc etc

The best bible for life in my opinion

out of personal experience: sometimes it's hard to know if sthn is the right thing for u or not. (if right for others, that's sthn else)..
So 2 pieces of advice here:

1. don't RUSH into things. THINK things all over thoroughly first.
2. don't think TOO much. because:
a. you will always find (trivial) demerits/flaws in EVERYTHING (=nth is perfect)
b. when u think too much and then make up ur mind, the chance u had might have already been long lost!

first of all i use my brains and the usual the way of deduction to the right conclusion and also my gut feelings... dun u sometimes feel uneasy when u meet a new person. this is because we all have an aura which reflects our personality... it can only be felt and not seen unless u r psychic

Not only psychopaths don`t realize sometimes that something they want is not something what is right! It is (not clinical!) psychology.
Awareness, consciousness & presence in every breath & step is the key to want what is right, & to differentiate it. In fact, it`s almost a formula of perfection.
We all know the right way /Really good posts above!/ To chose the right or to do wanted doesn`t always sounds a dilemma! We tend to go easier ways & we justify oneselves. Anyway, in most of cases… among all reasons, circumstances & variations it doesn`t really seem so hard to distinguish the main, the essence, - the right & wrong according to own system of values or at least generally accepted human values.

Evaluation, emotion and the process of reasoning. Its built into the human psyche. It is missing in the psychopath who bears no emotion or sense of remorse for their actions.

If you have an emotional response to a proposed decision (gut feeling) then it is often better to take a resoned look before making a choice as emotion can hide the consequences. In the end, you have the ability to evaluate the long term benefits to yourself and others around you before you decide.

"There is no 'cannot'...there is 'do', or 'do not'"

Knight

The ole do unto others as you would do unto yourself....................put the shoe on the other foot-if it fits well all is right-if not................don't do it!!

so it all boils down to one thing that we all should use our brains in ways as expressed by different ppl in the preceding posts

But brains can be too logical sometimes. Gut feelings are good and very often right.

In certain situations when your emotions are running high the first reaction is usually the correct one.

I'm just like Bart Simpson, can't have the electrified cup cake, but going to try and take it anyway. Gotta have it - owwwww - gotta have it - owwwww - gotta have it - owwwwww etc etc etc.

i still read "head and heart" in all your posts.

arniegang wrote:i still read "head and heart" in all your posts.

You have a problem to keep them together?..

"The heart has a reason that a reason cannot know"... Irrational thinking is a healthy part of an intellectual process. So all the rightness don`t come to logics only nor to "heart" decision.

what about the desire to do something just because the thought that its wrong or forbidden. Doesnt everyone get those desires ? There is an arabic proverb for this along the lines of "What is not permitted is always wanted" or for those of you who speak Arabic "il mamnoo3 marhgoub"

Kanelli thanks for the psychopath link, that explained alot hahahaha

MaaaD wrote:what about the desire to do something just because the thought that its wrong or forbidden. Doesnt everyone get those desires ? There is an arabic proverb for this along the lines of "What is not permitted is always wanted" or for those of you who speak Arabic "il mamnoo3 marhgoub"

Kanelli thanks for the psychopath link, that explained alot hahahaha

'The forbidden fruit' or ' You always want what you cannot have'?

Basic human nature!



Knight

Dubai Knight wrote:

MaaaD wrote:what about the desire to do something just because the thought that its wrong or forbidden. Doesnt everyone get those desires ? There is an arabic proverb for this along the lines of "What is not permitted is always wanted" or for those of you who speak Arabic "il mamnoo3 marhgoub"

Kanelli thanks for the psychopath link, that explained alot hahahaha

'The forbidden fruit' or ' You always want what you cannot have'?

Basic human nature!



Knight

yup exactly, like when you starting dating a girl and suddenly every girl around you is flirting with you and dropping hints .. whats the deal with that ! will some girl explain ?

MaaaD wrote:

Dubai Knight wrote:

MaaaD wrote:what about the desire to do something just because the thought that its wrong or forbidden. Doesnt everyone get those desires ? There is an arabic proverb for this along the lines of "What is not permitted is always wanted" or for those of you who speak Arabic "il mamnoo3 marhgoub"

Kanelli thanks for the psychopath link, that explained alot hahahaha

'The forbidden fruit' or ' You always want what you cannot have'?

Basic human nature!



Knight

yup exactly, like when you starting dating a girl and suddenly every girl around you is flirting with you and dropping hints .. whats the deal with that ! will some girl explain ?

Chocaholic explained it in another post...apparently girls are attracted by the smell of another girl on a man! Interesting!

Also, a man who is attached is obviously deemed 'worthy' by other females and hence attractive...

But when you are a sad and lonely guy and are looking for a girl...then you are stuffed!



Knight

Also, a man who is attached is obviously deemed 'worthy' by other females and hence attractive...

But when you are a sad and lonely guy and are looking for a girl...then you are stuffed!

Arniegang ..1

DK.............0

Douce`Amere wrote:Not only psychopaths don`t realize sometimes that something they want is not something what is right! It is (not clinical!) psychology.
Awareness, consciousness & presence in every breath & step is the key to want what is right, & to differentiate it. In fact, it`s almost a formula of perfection.
We all know the right way /Really good posts above!/ To chose the right or to do wanted doesn`t always sounds a dilemma! We tend to go easier ways & we justify oneselves. Anyway, in most of cases… among all reasons, circumstances & variations it doesn`t really seem so hard to distinguish the main, the essence, - the right & wrong according to own system of values or at least generally accepted human values.

I agree to watever you said.... Not only psychopaths don`t realize sometimes that something they want is not something what is right!...well said

Hmmm..

Have anyone tried to explore him/her self?

Try to learn when and why its desiring something... asking for something?

We always say that i was taking to myself...Have you tried to set between (You - and Your Self) .. and try to see what goes between abstractly?

How Deep you know your self?

Do you really know your self to the limit you can tell her to stop when you know that she is wrong?

By the way.. i am talking about schizophrenia .. i am talking about KNOWING our selves.

arniegang wrote:

Also, a man who is attached is obviously deemed 'worthy' by other females and hence attractive...

But when you are a sad and lonely guy and are looking for a girl...then you are stuffed!

Arniegang ..1

DK.............0

Yeah, but i refuse to go near taken men

Arnie........1

DK...........1

DK and I were "generalizing Vee, not person specific

So the original score stands

arniegang wrote:DK and I were "generalizing Vee, not person specific

So the original score stands

Your just a sore loser!

or is that just loser???

Knight

no wayyyyyyyyyy pedro

if it had been specific i still scored evens

sooooooo poo poo with knobs on and no returns

nah na nahhh na na

arniegang wrote:no wayyyyyyyyyy pedro

if it had been specific i still scored evens

sooooooo poo poo with knobs on and no returns

nah na nahhh na na

Vee: Ask us one on Politics or something so I can get one up...er in the score sheet that is!



Knight

If politics is your mastermind specialist topic, it would only be fair to give arnie the chance to pick a specific subject also...

As soon as that is confirmed, i will gladly chair the head to head