A couple of things have got me thinking. There was Sym's trip to the hospital for his check up and a programme I watched last night.
I was lying in bed last night doing a bit of channel hopping (slow night!) and came across a programme called Bizarre ER.
Interesting, thinks BM, and I put my remote down to watch the end 10 minutes. Two doctors were recalling incidents from the ER, I call it the ER, they were both English actually so I should call it A&E.
The first doctor recalled how he had to do a rectal examination. He had a perspex tube which he had to insert up a male patients bottom and then remove the inside of the tube so that he could examine him internally. Well when he finally got a look up all he could see was some psychedelic pattern. It took him a couple of minutes to realise he'd inserted his tie with the tube.
The second doctor told how he'd had to deal with an elderly male patient who had come in with a combination padlock around the base of his penis. (I sat up and took notice at this point). Apparantly he was using it in place of a penis ring, which BM has to admit she has only seen in use in the Reeperbahn in Hamburg. He must have been short of said ring at a crucial moment and grabbed the padlock. He'd had to come to the A&E, as being an elderly gent, he'd forgotten the combination. The doctor described his kn0b (the doctor's words, not BM's) as being 3 times it's normal size, and blue. The padlock was removed with a hack saw.
So I was wondering, has anyone had a medical emergency and how were you treated by the hospital? Not medically treated, but if you want to share, that's great. I'm always up for a tale.
I've had a couple of do's with my family over the years. The first one that springs to mind was in Germany when my eldest daughter was then 5 years old. Her dad was away on excercise, or manouvers for the Americanised amongst us. She complained of a sore leg which she seemed to be having difficulty moving so I took her to see the army doctor. He dismissed us telling me to rub some Algipan on it and make her walk on it. I carried her back to the car, dragging my other 4 year old daughter along behind us.
I took his advice and rubbed Algipan on it all night. After a sleepless night with two young kids, no husband, and not being much more than a kid myself, I decided to brave the Med Centre and take her back. We saw another doctor. This child is seriously ill, I was told, she needs to go to hospital. We don't have an ambulance, you'll have to take her yourself. BM sets off to the hospital after dropping the 4 year old off with a friend. The Military hospital was 2 hours drive from where we lived. I remember getting stopped twice that day by the German Police for speeding. We made it to the hospital 300 marks in speeding fines, poorer. Child was admitted and was diagnosed with septic arthritis. I stayed in the hospital with her for 3 weeks and even then the army would not let my husband come home. They didn't even pass the message on to him that his daughter was ill.
My second do was with my middle daughter , who was 20 and not living at home at the time. She was taken to the Royal London Hospital by her boyfriend, having not been well at all. She was sent home with a chest infection. When her boyfriend couldn't wake her the next day he rushed her back and she had a severe brain infection. The doctors at that hospital were fantastic but the nursing staff (who were mostly immigrants) were rubbish. When my daughter came out of Intensive Care (fantastic treatment) she went onto a general ward, the care was so poor I kicked off big style and in the end had a meeting with Head of Nursing who allocated a nurse on a one to one basis for her. Avoid the Royal London Hospital at all costs.
Luckily Beth is the picture of health.