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Can I ask if anyone else has received a 'threatening' PM? Now it's not in my nature to complain, I can honestly say I've never complained to anyone about anything said to me or about me on an internet forum, but I ask myself when do I start?
If action is taken against a person on the amount of complaints a moderator receives about that person, then must we resort to complaining to protect ourselves?
I have had many a fun exchange with 'virtual friends' via PM and it was most upsetting to get one of such a disturbing nature.

That's pretty lame, BM. I am pretty sure by the rules that a threatening PM would be an insta-ban. I have never received one myself.

If you're referring to the one I sent you BM - there was nothing 'threatening' in it! Stop throwing your toys out the pram because people are ticked off with the way you're treating them on the forum. Plus I know for a fact you've also been sent PM's from other members because of your actions.

If YOU feel threatened by people asking you to 'buck up' and they 'won't stand for your bullying', then maybe you should take a look at your actions and why people might feel the need to contact you directly in the first place!

Bethsmum wrote:Can I ask if anyone else has received a 'threatening' PM? Now it's not in my nature to complain, I can honestly say I've never complained to anyone about anything said to me or about me on an internet forum, but I ask myself when do I start?
If action is taken against a person on the amount of complaints a moderator receives about that person, then must we resort to complaining to protect ourselves?
I have had many a fun exchange with 'virtual friends' via PM and it was most upsetting to get one of such a disturbing nature.

What is the nature of the "threat"? If you can tell us.

Can it be ignored? Or more should it be ignored?

I'm afraid your post will just generate the tiresome "lecturing" - about "behaving" or else - that sadly is so prevalent on this forum

P.s. I get a number of silly PM's which I simply ignore...

-- Thu Nov 18, 2010 1:01 pm --

BTW, as I am as slow typist (actually easily distracted so it takes me time to type a post) - I began my reply before there were any other replies but I note the above posts and it appears that we will be back to some kind of school yard nonsense...oh dear..

Ambassador wrote:

Bethsmum wrote:Can I ask if anyone else has received a 'threatening' PM? Now it's not in my nature to complain, I can honestly say I've never complained to anyone about anything said to me or about me on an internet forum, but I ask myself when do I start?
If action is taken against a person on the amount of complaints a moderator receives about that person, then must we resort to complaining to protect ourselves?
I have had many a fun exchange with 'virtual friends' via PM and it was most upsetting to get one of such a disturbing nature.

What is the nature of the "threat"? If you can tell us.

Can it be ignored? Or more should it be ignored?

I'm afraid your post will just generate the tiresome "lecturing" - about "behaving" or else - that sadly is so prevalent on this forum

P.s. I get a number of silly PM's which I simply ignore...

-- Thu Nov 18, 2010 1:01 pm --

BTW, as I am as slow typist (actually easily distracted so it takes me time to type a post) - I began my reply before there were any other replies but I note the above posts and it appears that we will be back to some kind of school yard nonsense...oh dear..

She's not been 'threatened' in any way shape of form, merely asked 'what her problem is' - which I might add members are entitled to do if they feel constantly victimised by someone. Sadly her reaction is typical of the bully type, who when things start to backfire, they cry 'victim'.

Ambassador - if you feel that it's wrong for members to try and sort out their differences OFF the forum, then I feel sorry for you.

It's clear that some people just need to be ignored.

Chocoholic wrote:

Ambassador wrote:

Bethsmum wrote:Can I ask if anyone else has received a 'threatening' PM? Now it's not in my nature to complain, I can honestly say I've never complained to anyone about anything said to me or about me on an internet forum, but I ask myself when do I start?
If action is taken against a person on the amount of complaints a moderator receives about that person, then must we resort to complaining to protect ourselves?
I have had many a fun exchange with 'virtual friends' via PM and it was most upsetting to get one of such a disturbing nature.

What is the nature of the "threat"? If you can tell us.

Can it be ignored? Or more should it be ignored?

I'm afraid your post will just generate the tiresome "lecturing" - about "behaving" or else - that sadly is so prevalent on this forum

P.s. I get a number of silly PM's which I simply ignore...

-- Thu Nov 18, 2010 1:01 pm --

BTW, as I am as slow typist (actually easily distracted so it takes me time to type a post) - I began my reply before there were any other replies but I note the above posts and it appears that we will be back to some kind of school yard nonsense...oh dear..

She's not been 'threatened' in any way shape of form, merely asked 'what her problem is' - which I might add members are entitled to do if they feel constantly victimised by someone. Sadly her reaction is typical of the bully type, who when things start to backfire, they cry 'victim'.

Ambassador - if you feel that it's wrong for members to try and sort out their differences OFF the forum, then I feel sorry for you.

It's clear that some people just need to be ignored.

First, perhaps it was not your post that was the "threat" but obviously you think it was.

Second, please don't feel sorry for me. You need not worry about me one iota.

Third, just my opinion but if you are asking someone on a forum "what her problem is" I would tend to think there might be a "problem" on your part. I say so because the following can happen: a) She tells you what her problem is - unlikely; or b) She does not tell you - likely; or c) She responds in a way that makes up a "problem" or creates another "problem". In any of the cases (a,b, or c) I submit that there is likely nothing you can do about iher "problem" (really).

Forth, I never said there is anything wrong with anyone sorting out their differences (in any forum) - I do that day in and day out...

I made my post thinking that there was no "threat" at all and at worse the PM ought to be ignored...

That's all.

Good one, chocs for trying to keep such things off the forum but obviously and fortunately the recipent of your PM unfortunately felt a need for public sympathy by playing victim and the insaitable need for attention as always, brought it out into the forum regardless.

For someone that keeps lamenting here of being very well capable of tackling such issues and being extremely thick skinned seems like that isn't the case after all.

Firstly I would ask why Chocs thinks it is her I am refering to? And secondly I would ask how she knows I have received any PM's from anyone else? You seem to know an awful lot about my business.

Plus I know for a fact you've also been sent PM's from other members because of your actions.

Other members? Do enlighten me, I must be having problems receiving my PM's!
I do hope you aren't ganging together in an effort to get me banned? Isn't this bullying?
And to DDS, I'm sure if you had been lucky enough to receive a PM from me of the nature I have you received you would have taken steps against me behind the scenes. I have not complained, but simply ask, where should I draw the line?

I think BM has a very valid point about any PM content that is considered threatening and has a full right to bring this up to see what the other forumers thought.

If you have the content of the offending PM, you should post on a name and shame basis.

BB and BM were banned recently for little issues, what is said behind the scenes should be subject to the same discipline otherwise threads will be empty content, and the PM bin will be full.

Would it then be like an airforce saying "CHOCS AWAY CHAPPIES".

There was a period a few years ago when we had some PM 'stalkers' and the issue was simply resolved by the Mods and Admins.

If a member receives threatening or improper contact, then they can either ignore it or report it to the Mods or Admins as they feel necessary. A call will be taken as to whether the content is offensive or just an off forum argument and suitable action taken.



Knight

i.e : Settle it via PM regardless.

Dubai Knight wrote:There was a period a few years ago when we had some PM 'stalkers' and the issue was simply resolved by the Mods and Admins.

If a member receives threatening or improper contact, then they can either ignore it or report it to the Mods or Admins as they feel necessary. A call will be taken as to whether the content is offensive or just an off forum argument and suitable action taken.



Knight

Geeezzzzzuuuzzzz, this is worse that grade school and teachers.

What a can of worms. Now "private PM's" are going to be moderated. I've been around forums long enough (and moderate in one) to know you can't moderate PM's specially when PM's can be fabricated - just need to know how to use the [quote] function

Ridiculous me thinks...

I'm changing the Posters' Age pollls (yes, posters') to the following age groups.

a. Under 5 years old.
b. 6-8
c. 9-11
d. 12-14
c. 15-17
d 18-19

And it does not apply to posters but also moderators - it seems.

Ambassador wrote:

Dubai Knight wrote:There was a period a few years ago when we had some PM 'stalkers' and the issue was simply resolved by the Mods and Admins.

If a member receives threatening or improper contact, then they can either ignore it or report it to the Mods or Admins as they feel necessary. A call will be taken as to whether the content is offensive or just an off forum argument and suitable action taken.



Knight

Geeezzzzzuuuzzzz, this is worse that grade school and teachers.

What a can of worms. Now "private PM's" are going to be moderated. I've been around forums long enough (and moderate in one) to know you can't moderate PM's specially when PM's can be fabricated - just need to know how to use the

function

Ridiculous me thinks...

I'm changing the Posters' Age pollls (yes, posters') to the following age groups.

a. Under 5 years old.
b. 6-8
c. 9-11
d. 12-14
c. 15-17
d 18-19

And it does not apply to posters but also moderators - it seems.

Ambassador wrote:

Dubai Knight wrote:There was a period a few years ago when we had some PM 'stalkers' and the issue was simply resolved by the Mods and Admins.

If a member receives threatening or improper contact, then they can either ignore it or report it to the Mods or Admins as they feel necessary. A call will be taken as to whether the content is offensive or just an off forum argument and suitable action taken.



Knight

Geeezzzzzuuuzzzz, this is worse that grade school and teachers.

What a can of worms. Now "private PM's" are going to be moderated. I've been around forums long enough (and moderate in one) to know you can't moderate PM's specially when PM's can be fabricated - just need to know how to use the

function

Ridiculous me thinks...

I'm changing the Posters' Age pollls (yes, posters') to the following age groups.

a. Under 5 years old.
b. 6-8
c. 9-11
d. 12-14
c. 15-17
d 18-19

And it does not apply to posters but also moderators - it seems.

It seems our parking fine dodger has had a reality failure.

I am not advocating Moderation of PM's, merely that a member has the right to report threatening or abusive contact to the Admins if they feel it necessary. They are judge, jury and executioner and perfectly capable of deciding if the PM is spurious or not.



Knight

mummy someone sent me a "threatening" PM, please slap them

I wonder if it was a "life threatening pm"

Dubai Knight wrote: [moderators are] perfectly capable of deciding if the PM is spurious or not.

How? pray tell...

I mean other than thru favoritism...

I will say things on this subject only once.

If anyone on this Forum get any PM that causes them ANY great upset, contains any foul language, threatening or has has nastyness in it ( the list is numerous), that person will be banned without any notice and immediate without any discussion.

I personally dont care who it is whether i like them or not, friends with them or not, please believe me, they will go from DF.

BM if you feel strongly and really feel upset please please copy me on the PM and i will action it immediately.

BM and everyone else, please if you, or know of anyone on here, that have been sent such a PM please have them send to me and/or Sage a copy of the PM.

I was going to lock this thread because i feel my post is the final word to said on the subject, but if anyone feels they want to speak more openly on this subject, please put them up over the next few days.

Thanks all.

Ambassador wrote:

Dubai Knight wrote: [moderators are] perfectly capable of deciding if the PM is spurious or not.

How? pray tell...

I mean other than thru favoritism...

..............and we can do without your sarcasm on this serious subject, thank you Ambassador

I am one person who PM'ed BM, and this is what I said.

"You are only on this forum to wind people up and it is getting tiresome."

I'm trying to find the threatening part of that message. Daring to criticize you?

If multiple people have been PMing you, perhaps the problem is you and not everyone else.

BM, if you are done chucking your dummy from the pram, let's get on with some grown-up discussion.

(p.s. I also PMed Chocs and desertdude to tell them to ignore you because you are always attempting to bait them. That's how both might have guessed that I also PMed you.)

If you received a seriously threatening PM you would have contacted Andyba, especially if you don't like or trust any of the other moderators here. I also suspect you would have posted the threatening PM publicly to prove the point, even if you left the author's name out.

All a big hue and cry about nothing me thinks, In much cruder terms its know as being an attention w___e

arniegang wrote:

Ambassador wrote:

Dubai Knight wrote: [moderators are] perfectly capable of deciding if the PM is spurious or not.

How? pray tell...

I mean other than thru favoritism...

..............and we can do without your sarcasm on this serious subject, thank you Ambassador

Quite obviously you don't see how silly you sound.

But don't bother responding as I will say nothing further in reply as I have no interest in getting involved with inanity. I just pointed out that there is no way to determine whether a PM is "spurious" since if the "troublemaker" wanted to "ban" somebody he/she simply creates a PM (easy to do) and then forwards it to a moderator (it just gives master-baiters another playing field).

Ambassador wrote:Quite obviously you don't see how silly you sound.

But don't bother responding as I will say nothing further in reply as I have no interest in getting involved with inanity. I just pointed out that there is no way to determine whether a PM is "spurious" since if the "troublemaker" wanted to "ban" somebody he/she simply creates a PM (easy to do) and then forwards it to a moderator (it just gives master-baiters another playing field).

Moderators, please see PM I just received from "desertdudeshj". Please do something about this (I think I read you will ban him).

desertdudeshj wrote: Hey Ambassador stop posting on this forum or I will send someone to beat you and your family up so you'll never walk again

p.s. See what I mean about the silliness of now "moderating" pm's.

kanelli wrote:I am one person who PM'ed BM, and this is what I said.

"You are only on this forum to wind people up and it is getting tiresome."

I'm trying to find the threatening part of that message. Daring to criticize you?

If multiple people have been PMing you, perhaps the problem is you and not everyone else.

BM, if you are done chucking your dummy from the pram, let's get on with some grown-up discussion.

(p.s. I also PMed Chocs and desertdude to tell them to ignore you because you are always attempting to bait them. That's how both might have guessed that I also PMed you.)

If you received a seriously threatening PM you would have contacted Andyba, especially if you don't like or trust any of the other moderators here. I also suspect you would have posted the threatening PM publicly to prove the point, even if you left the author's name out.

Kanelli, If I may, I would like to put you right on a couple of points. I have never said that I received a threatening PM from you. If I have then please point me in that directon. I can handle a bit of critizism, I haven't got a problem with that but I prefer it in an open forum, if you don't mind, sending sneaky PMs after confuring with your mates just makes you look silly. And another fact FYI, I haven't received multiple PMs from people opposing me, just the two, and , contrary to what you, Chocs and DDS would like to believe, receive quite a few in support.

-- Fri Nov 19, 2010 10:35 am --

desertdudeshj wrote:All a big hue and cry about nothing me thinks, In much cruder terms its know as being an attention w___e

Can I remind you that name calling is supposed to be off limits? Didn't I get a ban for calling you a name? For a moderator to endorse a PM without knowing what's in it, just confirms my first thought that you are way out of your league trying to moderate anything, never mind a public forum.

Arnie, since you have left this open to further discussion:

DK pointed out in another thread that there are times when Mods have to sit on their hands. I think DDS ringing in is where this definitely warranted him sitting on his hands.

Chocs, came forward and pretty much claimed that the PM in question came from her. DDS, assuming he did not know the content of the PM, gave his support. Or, did he know the content? Was something going on behind the scenes that he supported? I don't know what DDS thought he would achieve with his statement, other than cause more irritation.

Good one, chocs for trying to keep such things off the forum but obviously and fortunately the recipent of your PM unfortunately felt a need for public sympathy by playing victim and the insaitable need for attention as always, brought it out into the forum regardless.

I don't know the content and would not support either one without knowing it. I know from public posts and PMs, Chocs can be very strong in her statements and has a tendancy to use !!! when she gets a bit heated. !!! = shouting. It's not so much what she says, but how she says it, which tends to have little or no diplomacy. When you fire off a strong statement and "shouting" at someone, the recipient more than likely is going to react.

Kanelli, openly admitted to her PM and posted what she said. Kanelli, has always been, IMO, diplomatic. So, when she speaks, people do (in most cases) listen. The only thing I have to say is that the baiting goes both ways with regard to DDS and BM.

Was this post necessary? Clearly directed at BM.

All a big hue and cry about nothing me thinks, In much cruder terms its know as being an attention w___e

The constant baiting by name calling and so-called criticism from DDS just keeps the fires burning. Again, he should have sat on his hands and refrained from commenting.

Now DDS may, in your opinion arnie, be right all the time, but no one is right 100% of the time.

I hope you will address all parties involved that need to be addressed.

Thank you for the opportunity to allow for further comments.

Edited to add: While I was typing this post, BM had posted. I had not seen her post until after I submitted my post.

I will also add: As most can recall, BM and I had a serious battle going on in her early days joining DF, during which time many stood on the sidelines and found it "entertaining", with the exception of one person. Today, BM and I don't fight, says things in good humor knowing what is being said is not for baiting purposes, but in humor. It probably started with a PM that I sent BM, the content need not be revealed, but the fact is we both called a truce. At the same time, my "relationship" with Dillon and Drew has also taken a turn for the better. This would not have been possible if all of us continued the way we were going. So maybe some people need to make an effort and back off and take their own advice: let it go..............

Again, just to keep the facts straight, I did receive more than two PMs, just as Kanelli claims, in fact the third one was from her also. Kanelli, I will leave it to you whether you care to reveal the content of PM aswell.

This is a typical DF thread

kanelli wrote:I am one person who PM'ed BM, and this is what I said.

"You are only on this forum to wind people up and it is getting tiresome."

I'm trying to find the threatening part of that message. Daring to criticize you?

If multiple people have been PMing you, perhaps the problem is you and not everyone else.

BM, if you are done chucking your dummy from the pram, let's get on with some grown-up discussion.

(p.s. I also PMed Chocs and desertdude to tell them to ignore you because you are always attempting to bait them. That's how both might have guessed that I also PMed you.)

If you received a seriously threatening PM you would have contacted Andyba, especially if you don't like or trust any of the other moderators here. I also suspect you would have posted the threatening PM publicly to prove the point, even if you left the author's name out.

why am I not surprised you had something to do with it ? I knew its either you or choc, so typical from the both of yaa.you both are a control freaks , you just want it to be your way and only your way.sad.

The plot is thickening!! I’m definitely inquisitive now!!

When using the word “threatening” I’m assuming that the PM must’ve come from somebody with some powers, i.e. moderators.

We regular “Joes” on DF cannot really rise to the level of being threatening (in such a virtual world where we’re all anonymous.

The only (active) Mods in General are Arnie and Sage. Clearly Arnie did not send such a PM, because he offered to take action against the person who sent you the PM.

That leaves Sage, whom I highly doubt would send a threatening PM to anyone. He may send a warning, but I don’t think he’s able ban anyone. I think the only Mod who can ban anyone is Arnie.

So, BM, it’s time you revealed “who done it??”. I’m dying to know!!!

I’m biting my nails…… I can’t wait!!!!

----------------------------------------------------

Right after I wrote the above, I'm just noticing that the Mystery is over. It’s Kanelli!

That’s quite a surprise!!! Sweet Kanelli??????

Now I’m dying to know what sort of threat was it???




We’ll stay tuned!!!!