Dubai Forums Dubai Discussions Dubai General Chat

GulfNews took a good initiative to answer questions from the general public. Here are a few gems, remember there are no stupid questions, only stupid people.

How safe the Metro would be? Some people have phobia and don’t like close or congested area in train.
Khalid Hanid
West London, UK

Oh noez! You don't like "close or congested area in train" [sic]? Then don't ride the metro moron.

Will Dubai Metro cut down cost of living in Dubai? (eg. House rent, School fee, food commodity, etc)?

Yes, the metro will come with some divine power that will magically reduce academic fees and grocery prices, dumbаss.

Are all the stations on the red line going to be open on 9/9 for commuters?

Have you been living in a cave for the past 2 weeks?

How can I get a metro ticket, where I have never in my life experienced it. Thanks
Yakoob Khan
Dubai, UAE

I think that getting a metro ticket isn't the only thing in your life you haven't experienced.

From where to buy ticket?
Naresh Bhatia
Dubai, UAE

How is babby formed?

For how much time Metro will stop per station? Is it like 3 to 5 minutes or less than that? Standing is allowed in trains or not?

Yeah, the train will stop 5 minutes per station, top efficiency here. You'll also have toilet breaks at each station, how does that sound Dorothy? But don't you dare stand up.

If I need to travel one single journey, can I buy one ticket from the counter or I need to buy the card (Dh20)?
Sebastain
Dubai, UAE

You're going to have to ask your mommy to buy you a ticket "Sebastain"

Can I use my NOL pass to accompany another person with me?
Sam
Dubai, UAE

Why of course, bring as many of your little friends from the short bus with you.

Which are the ten stations opening on Red Line on 9th September? I wonder if you can help me, it's my wife's birthday on the 9th Sep and I wanted to take her for a ride on that day. Is it possible to get a pass? Many thanks.
Vijay Teki
Dubai, UAE

Some people take their wives on a balloon ride for their birthdays, some bake them on a romantic dinner. This guy wants to drag his wife along on a 2.5dhs metro ride, hope you have a good divorce lawyer.

Can the father of the children accompany the mother and kids in the ladies compartment or should he travel in separate compartment?
Surya
Dubai, UAE

You can also accompany them to the ladies bathroom, god forbid your family stays a few minutes without your fervent supervision, idiot.

Please tell me what is red line station?
Tawfeek
Dubai, UAE

Wow, just wow.

There are more but I'm getting high blood pressure from reading all these dumb people's posts.

Some of those questions are not so stupid.

1- "Are all the stations on the red line going to be open on 9/9 for commuters?"

Very legit question. The answer is in fact no. It will be open to commuters on 10/9. Have you known this for 2 weeks?

2- "From where to buy ticket? "

How can you assume this is a stupid question? Do you know all the distribution methods that the RTA plans to use- now and in the future? In Canada, I could buy subway passes from places ranging from Chinese restaurants to bookshops and stationaries. Do you really know where the passes will inevitably be available?

3- "If I need to travel one single journey, can I buy one ticket from the counter or I need to buy the card (Dh20)? "

Not such a stupid question if the person has never used a metro before.

4- Can the father of the children accompany the mother and kids in the ladies compartment or should he travel in separate compartment?

You are aware that travelling is part of the fun of an outing and since this family have kids they might well enjoy the metro as an experience. What is the problem with a man asking if he can spend the time with his family or not?

5- Which are the ten stations opening on Red Line on 9th September? I wonder if you can help me, it's my wife's birthday on the 9th Sep and I wanted to take her for a ride on that day. Is it possible to get a pass?

Yes, some people buy their wives balloon rides. Some people are rich.
This guy probably isn't. For him, the metro is a big thing. Of course, in Dubai, that just makes him stupid.

6- How can I get a metro ticket, where I have never in my life experienced it. Thanks

This isn't a dumb question. It is obvious that this person is just asking where he can buy a ticket and is having trouble expressing himself in English. In his mother tongue, the question probably does not sound so stupid. Also, not everyone has been devoting the last few years of his life to learn how the metro will operate. Where to buy a ticket is a perfectly legitimate question.

I agree some questions are dumb but you are severely exaggerating how funny/stupid you believe these questions to be. High blood pressure- yeah right.

Medvezhonok, I think you're a bit of a DA yourself! You have to remember that a very large number of the population will never have experienced a metro before and will have no idea what to expect.

1- The guy is asking this question on Gulfnews. Right Next to the "Submit Question" button is the link to the "Only 10 stations will open on September 9th" article.

2- While I agree that the question itself is not stupid, when you know that your post will be read by thousands of people, the least you can do is try to formulate it in a way that doesn't make you sound like a moron.

3- That question is coming from a guy who can't even spell his own name. Enough said.

4- When you go to the pool does it make sense to ask if you can accompany your wife in the woman's changing room?

5- It's a metro ride.. as a birthday gift.. for his wife. This has nothing to do with money, it's just stupid.

6- What hasn't he experienced, the metro? The ticket? Does he think the ticket is just going to fall from the sky?

Chocoholic wrote:Medvezhonok, I think you're a bit of a DA yourself! You have to remember that a very large number of the population will never have experienced a metro before and will have no idea what to expect.

Tell that to Mr Shezad who is wondering if the metro will bring down food prices. How some of these people remember to breathe is beyond me.

Medvezhonok wrote:1- The guy is asking this question on Gulfnews. Right Next to the "Submit Question" button is the link to the "Only 10 stations will open on September 9th" article.

2- While I agree that the question itself is not stupid, when you know that your post will be read by thousands of people, the least you can do is try to formulate it in a way that doesn't make you sound like a moron.

3- That question is coming from a guy who can't even spell his own name. Enough said.

4- When you go to the pool does it make sense to ask if you can accompany your wife in the woman's changing room?

5- It's a metro ride.. as a birthday gift.. for his wife. This has nothing to do with money, it's just stupid.

6- What hasn't he experienced, the metro? The ticket? Does he think the ticket is just going to fall from the sky?

You know what the funny thing is. You don't even know the answer to the first question yourself. The 10 stations will NOT be open to commuters on 9/9. It is old information.

Medvezhonok wrote:

Chocoholic wrote:Medvezhonok, I think you're a bit of a DA yourself! You have to remember that a very large number of the population will never have experienced a metro before and will have no idea what to expect.

Tell that to Mr Shezad who is wondering if the metro will bring down food prices. How some of these people remember to breathe is beyond me.

That question WAS retarded to be honest. I wonder what his rationale was. If anything, it should bring UP food prices. More people may be inclined to move to Dubai and demand on food will increase. Also, with people spending less on transport, they will have more money to spend on other stuff including food. Again, demand increases, price increases. That really was a bad question.

Medvezhonok wrote:1- The guy is asking this question on Gulfnews. Right Next to the "Submit Question" button is the link to the "Only 10 stations will open on September 9th" article.

dee7o wrote:You know what the funny thing is. You don't even know the answer to the first question yourself. The 10 stations will NOT be open to commuters on 9/9. It is old information.

The even funnier thing is that I'm the one who started the thread about the metro opening on September 10th with only 10 stations http://www.dubaiforums.com/viewtopic.php?t=37446

Sadly you have to remember that many of the people who would submit such questions have limited intelligence, so what do you expect really.

Chocoholic wrote:Sadly you have to remember that many of the people who would submit such questions have limited intelligence, so what do you expect really.

Hence the high comedic value, I see you got the point of the thread.

Medvezhonok wrote:

Medvezhonok wrote:1- The guy is asking this question on Gulfnews. Right Next to the "Submit Question" button is the link to the "Only 10 stations will open on September 9th" article.

dee7o wrote:You know what the funny thing is. You don't even know the answer to the first question yourself. The 10 stations will NOT be open to commuters on 9/9. It is old information.

The even funnier thing is that I'm the one who started the thread about the metro opening on September 10th with only 10 stations http://www.dubaiforums.com/viewtopic.php?t=37446

sorry not really following every thread you open or every thread about the metro.

Are women and men segregated in the metro?

dee7o made some really valid points, then again i do find medvez's thread opener kinda funny.

on a serious note...living in dubai is similar to living anywhere in the world.

there will always be people who are much more exposed to the world than others. it's just the reaction to the less exposed and less fortunate that makes dubai different. People have become cocky here I guess forgetting that the majority of their own people back at home would ask much sillier questions.

I remember very well when McDonald's opened in Beirut, I saw people all dressed up in SUITS and queuing in line to be part of the hype...and they didn't miss a chance for weeks after that to slip the note in every chit chat that they INDEED had dinner in McDO! ...True story.

VRV wrote:dee7o made some really valid points, then again i do find medvez's thread opener kinda funny.

on a serious note...living in dubai is similar to living anywhere in the world.

there will always be people who are much more exposed to the world than others. it's just the reaction to the less exposed and less fortunate that makes dubai different. People have become cocky here I guess forgetting that the majority of their own people back at home would ask much sillier questions.

I remember very well when McDonald's opened in Beirut, I saw people all dressed up in SUITS and queuing in line to be part of the hype...and they didn't miss a chance for weeks after that to slip the note in every chit chat that they INDEED had dinner in McDO! ...True story.

Actually, that McDonald's occurrence happened in Egypt too. You have to keep in mind though that when McDonald's opened in these countries, Arabs were less westernized than they are now and globalisation was still in its infancy. The way we talk, dress and act has changed since then. People all over the world are gradually becoming more and more casual.

I believe there are carriages for women and children. But really in this day and age, everyone for themselves.

Did anyone watch the opening last night?

The Dubai One coverage was hysterical, the translator sounded like Borat with a cold. I haven't laughed so much in ages.

Can anyone please post the pictures of the inaguration ceremony.

Chocoholic wrote:the translator sounded like Borat with a cold. I haven't laughed so much in ages.

hahaha, my thoughts exactly.

The presenters were soooooo bad! Shame that it will be remembered for all the wrong reasons.

Chocoholic wrote:I believe there are carriages for women and children. But really in this day and age, everyone for themselves.

Did anyone watch the opening last night?

The Dubai One coverage was hysterical, the translator sounded like Borat with a cold. I haven't laughed so much in ages.

thats funny. i on the other hand watched the first 20 minutes of the arabic version and knew were in for a REALLY boring ride. and what's with the NOL card. h8 the name. i bought the lol card, recharge my lol card please.

@dee7o... at large I agree with what u said, but this is not ancient history I'm talking about. This is 1996 or so. We were already westernized. we did everything we do today. and I'm talking about Beirut here. We lebanese people love to make things seem more important than they are...it all boils down to exposure. and i said I can see the humour in the first thread because I do remember myself laughing my ass off looking at the suited and queued up people...its just too funny. I was raised in dubai, so i knew better.

PS: I'm very new here on the forums...welcome me people

VRV wrote:

Chocoholic wrote:I believe there are carriages for women and children. But really in this day and age, everyone for themselves.

Did anyone watch the opening last night?

The Dubai One coverage was hysterical, the translator sounded like Borat with a cold. I haven't laughed so much in ages.

thats funny. i on the other hand watched the first 20 minutes of the arabic version and knew were in for a REALLY boring ride. and what's with the NOL card. h8 the name. i bought the lol card, recharge my lol card please.

@dee7o... at large I agree with what u said, but this is not ancient history I'm talking about. This is 1996 or so. We were already westernized. we did everything we do today. and I'm talking about Beirut here. We lebanese people love to make things seem more important than they are...it all boils down to exposure. and i said I can see the humour in the first thread because I do remember myself laughing my a#s off looking at the suited and queued up people...its just too funny. I was raised in dubai, so i knew better.

PS: I'm very new here on the forums...welcome me people

Welcome to dubaiforums VRV (tabla sounds in the background)

Medvezhonok you are hilarious !

Damn. You guys have gots to be kidding here. I am very surprised.

First of all, these questions are not stupid. They are valid questions coming from people who haven't experienced anything of this sort. Just because us expats were born with these facilities around us Doesnt give us the right to make fun of curious people.

Whichever one of you used the term "limited intelligence", I got one better for you. How about limited knowledge? I would like to see you to go to say, a country like India and ask supposedly dumb questions about stuff you haven't seen before and be called a person with limited intelligence.

Next time before making cracks about people who perhaps can't spell their name right in English or is excited about experiencing something new with his wife on her birthday, think twice. And THANK Whichever God you believe in that these people put up with expats like us.

abyssdesire wrote:Damn. You guys have gots to be kidding here. I am very surprised.

First of all, these questions are not stupid. They are valid questions coming from people who haven't experienced anything of this sort. Just because us expats were born with these facilities around us Doesnt give us the right to make fun of curious people.

Whichever one of you used the term "limited intelligence", I got one better for you. How about limited knowledge? I would like to see you to go to say, a country like India and ask supposedly dumb questions about stuff you haven't seen before and be called a person with limited intelligence.

Next time before making cracks about people who perhaps can't spell their name right in English or is excited about experiencing something new with his wife on her birthday, think twice. And THANK Whichever God you believe in that these people put up with expats like us.

Let me guess, you're one of the people who asked a question I posted.

abyssdesire wrote:Damn. You guys have gots to be kidding here. I am very surprised.

First of all, these questions are not stupid. They are valid questions coming from people who haven't experienced anything of this sort. Just because us expats were born with these facilities around us Doesnt give us the right to make fun of curious people.

Whichever one of you used the term "limited intelligence", I got one better for you. How about limited knowledge? I would like to see you to go to say, a country like India and ask supposedly dumb questions about stuff you haven't seen before and be called a person with limited intelligence.

Next time before making cracks about people who perhaps can't spell their name right in English or is excited about experiencing something new with his wife on her birthday, think twice. And THANK Whichever God you believe in that these people put up with expats like us.

The original poster is a supercilious little fool who finds it childishly funny when people try to express themselves in a language which is not their native tongue, and so can't always form correct sentences or express their thoughts clearly. It's a very low form of humour and is based on taking cheap shots at less fortunate people. he uses a lot of aggression and violent idea in his posts, very immature in fact.

He also finds it funny when, as you say, people who have never experienced something like an unmanned trains and self service ticket machines before try to grasp the concept. He believes this has 'high comedic value". He probably thinks the same of the Marx Brothers.

His childishness is appalling, and anyone who said that he is hilarious is most likely using their parents' computer to read these messages.

I think you are doing yourself a huge disservice when you say 'expats like us' and put yourself in the same bracket as this person.

Speedhump wrote:He probably thinks the same of the Marx Brothers.

I'm not reading this moron's retarded posts anymore (he basically plagiarizes his own garbage over and over), but I'll go on record saying that the Marx Brothers are pure comedic genius and anyone who disagrees is an idiot.

Medvezhonok wrote:

Speedhump wrote:He probably thinks the same of the Marx Brothers.

I'm not reading this moron's retarded posts anymore (he basically plagiarizes his own garbage over and over), but I'll go on record saying that the Marx Brothers are pure comedic genius and anyone who disagrees is an idiot.

hahahaha

Why am I not surprised?

How to plagiarise your own garbage? Weird. 'Oh damn, I found my hand in my pocket stealing my money'.....use of English, appalling....and you dare to criticise the writers of the Metro comments.

One word to you from another thread....acronym?

Carry on troll.

Speedhump wrote:hahahaha

Why am I not surprised?

How to plagiarise your own garbage? Weird. 'Oh damn, I found my hand in my pocket stealing my money'.....use of English, appalling....and you dare to criticise the writers of the Metro comments.

One word to you from another thread....acronym?

Carry on troll.

Holy crap, talk about missing the point, are you really that stupid or just putting on a show for our entertainment?

And FYI dipshit, IQ is an acronym http://acronyms.thefreedictionary.com/IQ

DAMN that must hurt! You win the dumbass award. Permanently.

Something seriously wrong with the quality of moderation on these forums.

Medvezhonok wrote:

Speedhump wrote:hahahaha

Why am I not surprised?

How to plagiarise your own garbage? Weird. 'Oh damn, I found my hand in my pocket stealing my money'.....use of English, appalling....and you dare to criticise the writers of the Metro comments.

One word to you from another thread....acronym?

Carry on troll.

Holy crap, talk about missing the point, are you really that stupid or just putting on a show for our entertainment?

And FYI dipshit, IQ is an acronym http://acronyms.thefreedictionary.com/IQ

DAMN that must hurt! You win the dumbass award. Permanently.

At the risk of harming you permanently, I have to tell you that you and your stupid cut and past lifestyle is washed out, as are the free and rubbishy webstes you use.

If you tried to receive an education instead of just spending your school days trolling the internet for unconfirmed opinion, you would know that an acronym is a word which can be spoken, and is made from the first letters of other words. NATO is one. UNESCO another. AIDS too (you probably know that one well, you must use it as an insult in your pathetic online tirades quite often). IQ is just two initials whch are spoken aloud seperately. IVF is the same (you know, the way you were made in a test tube from the seed of an axe murderer and the egg of a mad woman?).

That was why I asked you if when you see IQ you say 'ikk'. Any dim light flashing inside your tiny brain yet?

No online dictionaries were harmed in the making of this message. All the information comes from inside my head. Try it just once.

Sad litle git!!

desertdudeshj wrote:Something seriously wrong with the quality of moderation on these forums.

Sage is up to his eyes in China right now....