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PointGiven, she didnt just hop into bed with some guy she barely knew, it was a 4 year relationship. And im sorry, but if virginity is such a big deal in the arab culture, then why dont men keep their pants on? Most men go off and have fun, then when its time to settle down, they want a virgin. If the guy is a virgin, thats a whole other story, but i will never understand how men can sleep around then expect their wife to be a virgin.

SarahC wrote:PointGiven, she didnt just hop into bed with some guy she barely knew, it was a 4 year relationship. And im sorry, but if virginity is such a big deal in the arab culture, then why dont men keep their pants on? Most men go off and have fun, then when its time to settle down, they want a virgin. If the guy is a virgin, thats a whole other story, but i will never understand how men can sleep around then expect their wife to be a virgin.

You know 4 years or 10 years, she's just not supposed to hop into bed and that is it. If I play with fire and know that it can burn me, I just don't do it. I am just telling it as it is. That's the rules in Arab/Muslim society. If you don't play by them, you better have a backup plan. There are things where logic, pragmatisme and common sense don't make sense:-) And as I said, men are also supposed to be virgins, but hard to prove. Ettayibine li attayibate. It's going to be a lost venture to rewrite the rules in this subject. Probably not in my life.

Ok, but what about women who engage in other acts just to preserve their virginity? Is that better than a girl who is being honest with you about her past relationships? I was shocked to hear how common it is for women to satisfy their boyfriends in other ways, just so they remain virgins.

Well, if you are asking my personal opinion, I can deal with the truth, but I can't deal with lies. I prefer to know and her being honest with me so I can deal with it, than find out later on.

Unfortunately, many do lie, so theres no way to know, just like its impossible to know whether a guy is a virgin. Which is why i think the truth is always better, even if its not what you want to hear.

SarahC wrote:Unfortunately, many do lie, so theres no way to know, just like its impossible to know whether a guy is a virgin. Which is why i think the truth is always better, even if its not what you want to hear.

So tell me, this friend of yours, is it you?

The truth is that a lie can serve you one day, but the truth serve you all the time.

No, its not Why is it when people post anything on the net, someone always comes along and asks that question?

SarahC wrote:No, its not Why is it when people post anything on the net, someone always comes along and asks that question?

You tell me

If i knew i wouldnt ask now, would i ?
But if i were to guess, maybe some people just arent comfortable talking about their own personal lives, i dunno.

SarahC wrote:If i knew i wouldnt ask now, would i ?
But if i were to guess, maybe some people just arent comfortable talking about their own personal lives, i dunno.

Only teasing, but true, some people are uncomfortable probably talking about their own personal lives, even behind a monitor.

I don't blame the girl at all in this. Why should she feel like less of a person or ashamed for giving herself to someone she loved and thought she'd be marrying? She wasn't running around sleeping with every guy she could. Besides, how do we know what the guy's s.e.x.ua.l history is? So many guys hide their s.e.xual past and still expect to marry a virgin, even though they didn't stay a virgin for marriage themselves. There are lots of women who use lots of foreplay and an.a.l s.e.x so that they still appear to be virgins for marriage. If all he cares about is seeing some blood on the sheets when he gets married, then fine, he can delude himself that he's found a pure woman who he doesn't have to feel s.e.x.ually inferior to.

RobbyG wrote:

worldguy wrote:I would disagree mate as I know quite a few such couples ..... you seriously need to get out more.

Keep focussed please I'm talking 'those men'. Not the integrated/assimilated ones that found their luck in a Euro lady.

Try and pay some attention. Your manipulating the point.

You just did the same as me, but will never accept that.

Anyway getting to the subject. I had another conversation over dinner as its the perception of Arab women that makes it difficult for some Arab men to view them with respect.

Before any one thinks of having a go at me (There are lot of fools here), this is as I heard.

The Arab are fake from the outside and never disclose the inside. What they show on the outside is plastic and in inside they are all chasing the money. The arab guy will be with a European lady and trust her as she would mostly stay faithful once in a good relationship, but they will always suspect the Arab women.

I personally found this very weird as some of the Arab women I know are really good at heart and dedicated to their husbands. They are quite sensitive, some can be stubborn, but they can not be branded. i feel there are different people in all races and religion.

In addition the other thing is that Arab men expect Arab women to stay virgin and should only lose it to their husbands, but rest of them come from different cultures and thus we need to adapt to that. After that I just sat there quiet as that mindset coming from a successful bunch or arabs in their late 20's was shocking. I hope these guys are just a small percentage and do not reflect the broader mindset of arab men.

worldguy wrote:i feel there are different people in all races and religion.

Very enlightening words of wisdom. I'm going to have to research this.

Some guys tend to get really possessive when in love. You need to be tactful when dealing with them. You see as far as relationships here are concerned, it's sad, but the stakes are always higher for the woman.

The thing with Arab girls is that they are supposed to get married really young. Even 24-26 is considered old for them. If they are not married by 30 then the chances of them finding a husband are really bleak. They end up settling as the second or third wife.

So here's what I think happened:
Maybe the guy was just seeking an exit from the relationship or just dilly dallying, but the girl coerced him into staying on. She probably blackmailed him saying that since everyone knows we're a couple you gotta get married to me. And then the guy pulls out his 'Virgin' trump card.

But when nature pushes you in a corner, you just adapt. Maybe that's why I've found Arab women to be that much more wiser, nicer and mature as compared to their male counterparts.
Trust me eventually this place will be ruled by the women folk.

U can always say who's got a headake on friday morning

Misery Called Life wrote:Some guys tend to get really possessive when in love. You need to be tactful when dealing with them. You see as far as relationships here are concerned, it's sad, but the stakes are always higher for the woman.

The thing with Arab girls is that they are supposed to get married really young. Even 24-24 is considered old for them. If they are not married by 30 then the chances of them finding a husband are really bleak. They end up settling as the second or third wife.

So here's what I think happened.
Maybe the guy was just seeking an exit from the relationship, but the girl coerced him into staying on. She probably blackmailed him saying that since everyone knows we're a couple you gotta get married to me. And then the guy pulls out his 'Virgin' trump card.

But when nature pushes you in a corner, you just adapt. Maybe that's why I've found Arab women to be that much more wiser, nicer and mature as compared to their male counterparts.
Trust me eventually this place will be ruled by the women folk.

In theory that might be right, but in practice it will be forbidden

Who votes for a renewed Cleopatra?

MSL,

Most Women are more mature than Men of the same age period. It's not an Arab thing.

PointGiven wrote:MSL,

Most Women are more mature than Men of the same age period. It's not an Arab thing.

Point Taken.

I guess as you get older, the gap reduces.

Misery Called Life wrote:

PointGiven wrote:MSL,

Most Women are more mature than Men of the same age period. It's not an Arab thing.

Point Taken.

I guess as you get older, the gap reduces.

MCL, we are always waiting for the man to catch up but, and this is endearing, there is always that little boy in them that refuses to grow up.

Bora Bora wrote:

Misery Called Life wrote:

PointGiven wrote:MSL,

Most Women are more mature than Men of the same age period. It's not an Arab thing.

Point Taken.

I guess as you get older, the gap reduces.

MCL, we are always waiting for the man to catch up but, and this is endearing, there is always that little boy in them that refuses to grow up.

I am the perfect example, and I am enjoying it

PointGiven wrote:

Bora Bora wrote:

Misery Called Life wrote:

PointGiven wrote:MSL,

Most Women are more mature than Men of the same age period. It's not an Arab thing.

Point Taken.

I guess as you get older, the gap reduces.

MCL, we are always waiting for the man to catch up but, and this is endearing, there is always that little boy in them that refuses to grow up.

I am the perfect example, and I am enjoying it

RobbyG wrote:Who votes for a renewed Cleopatra?

Cleo's definitely got my vote. Actually there some outstanding female visionaries in the GCC .

Check out a Kuwaiti candidate for the upcoming polls:-
http://www.kuwaittimes.net/read_news.ph ... k3NDU1MjAy

Bahrain's ambassador to the US
http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2008 ... 268662.htm

UAE's very own
http://www.vitalvoices.org/desktopdefau ... age_id=747

http://www.forbes.com/lists/2007/11/biz ... _MV6R.html

MCL, I worked with Lubna for a year. She is one of the smartest people (gender excluded) I have ever met. A very, very hard worker. There are men who don't want to stand toe-to-toe with her because she would eat them up and spit them out.

Misery Called Life wrote:

RobbyG wrote:Who votes for a renewed Cleopatra?

Cleo's definitely got my vote. Actually there some outstanding female visionaries in the GCC .

Check out a Kuwaiti candidate for the upcoming polls:-
http://www.kuwaittimes.net/read_news.ph ... k3NDU1MjAy

Bahrain's ambassador to the US
http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2008 ... 268662.htm

UAE's very own
http://www.vitalvoices.org/desktopdefau ... age_id=747

http://www.forbes.com/lists/2007/11/biz ... _MV6R.html

The eyes want something too MCL. Just think of a beautiful Cleopatra. A woman to be desired but powerful at the very same time.

Beauty with vision please

We want to attract investors, not scare them away from the UAE

Bora Bora wrote:MCL, I worked with Lubna for a year. She is one of the smartest people (gender excluded) I have ever met. A very, very hard worker. There are men who don't want to stand toe-to-toe with her because she would eat them up and spit them out.

Wow....Lucky you.
I was particularly impressed with her stand on labor reforms. She took a lot of flak for it. In fact Bahrain's decision to scrap the sponsorship system was an idea that was initiated by her. Off course it didn't go down well with the business community here.

Her track record is indeed impressive.

RobbyG wrote:The eyes want something too MCL. Just think of a beautiful Cleopatra. A woman to be desired but powerful at the very same time.

Beauty with vision please

We want to attract investors, not scare them away from the UAE

In Business

CEO Jafza
http://www.zu.ac.ae/leadership2008/hareb.html

CEO Dubai Infinity Holdings
http://www.gulfnews.com/business/General/10224138.html


Good enough Robby? Beauty and Brains!

RobbyG wrote:

Misery Called Life wrote:

RobbyG wrote:Who votes for a renewed Cleopatra?

Cleo's definitely got my vote. Actually there some outstanding female visionaries in the GCC .

Check out a Kuwaiti candidate for the upcoming polls:-
http://www.kuwaittimes.net/read_news.ph ... k3NDU1MjAy

Bahrain's ambassador to the US
http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2008 ... 268662.htm

UAE's very own
http://www.vitalvoices.org/desktopdefau ... age_id=747

http://www.forbes.com/lists/2007/11/biz ... _MV6R.html

The eyes want something too MCL. Just think of a beautiful Cleopatra. A woman to be desired but powerful at the very same time.

Beauty with vision please

We want to attract investors, not scare them away from the UAE

Well you know Rob, women like eye candy also. And if you look at Carl Lagerfeld who built an empire, he's not exactly easy on the eyes. Not now, nor was he ever.

Misery Called Life wrote:

RobbyG wrote:The eyes want something too MCL. Just think of a beautiful Cleopatra. A woman to be desired but powerful at the very same time.

Beauty with vision please

We want to attract investors, not scare them away from the UAE

In Business

CEO Jafza
http://www.zu.ac.ae/leadership2008/hareb.html

CEO Dubai Infinity Holdings
http://www.gulfnews.com/business/General/10224138.html

Good enough Robby? Beauty and Brains!

Now we're talking business