To The Aged/the Experienced

Topic locked
  • Reply
To the aged/the experienced Apr 11, 2009
Have you always had a plan on how your life should be like, Or have you just gone wherever life led you?

Do we always need a plan?

Have you now become who you wanted to be when you were young? If yes, how did you make it?

Do the above questions make sense?

WhiteJade
Dubai Forums Veteran
User avatar
Posts: 1430
Location: China

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
If you're looking for the true essence of life, yes they make sense.

A great deal of sense. ;)

As a matter of fact, I'm struggling with the same issues here, since I don't know where to start my new career move. So maybe I have to lead myself into one and find out whether it was the right or wrong move.

Its difficult I agree. I'm such a thinker too Jade.

I wonder what others have to say about this.
RobbyG
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
Posts: 5927
Location: ---

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
I have no plan. All my life, I feel like I'm running...from one big problem to the next, all I do is to try to solve these never-ending problems which never get solved because there's nothing that can be done about them...
Snow
Dubai forums Addict
User avatar
Posts: 297

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
Hey Jade you stole the words outta my mouth.....I was on the verge of starting a similar thread.
To all the experianced folks out there, plz shower us, 'the naive' with your pearls of wisidom!

It's not only about careers, it's about life, what did you do in your twenties?
Misery Called Life
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 3033

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
I have never had a game plan. I've meandered through life without any real direction. I do have an overwhelming feeling of under achievement.

Should I have done things differently? Yes!
smoggie
Dubai Expat Helper
Posts: 543

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
You can’t really plan your life. Even if you did make a plan, you could never stick to it. Life is not presented to us like a geographical map that allows us to plan and choose the path we want to take.

The best you can do is set lifetime goals for yourself, education goals, career goals, financial goals, family goals, ..etc, then set out to achieve these goals. Make sure these goals are realistic, and then go for it. As you grow older, you will need to fine-tune or change your goals, but that’s OK. With time, our priorities change and our outlook to life also changes.

To me, the direction is more important than the plan. But always remember that life isn't what you want it to be, it's what you make it become.

I myself never had a plan. I had goals and aspirations. I achieved some but could not achieve the others. I can’t say I have no regrets either.

Would I do it differently if I had to do it all over again? Sure, I would, because I much wiser and much more knowledgeable now than I was when I was in my 20’s.

Cheers!!!

8) 8) 8)
Tom Jones
Dubai Forums Veteran
User avatar
Posts: 1367

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
I am ful of plans, the problem is...where to start without getting in that damn comfort zone and find something exciting that is worth fighting for!

I hate the standard day jobs. I need excitement, a leadership role and global development path with coaching!

Anyone got that for me!? :lol:

I do know alot, but I don't know everthing....sigh ;)
RobbyG
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
Posts: 5927
Location: ---

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
RobbyG wrote:I am ful of plans, the problem is...where to start without getting in that damn comfort zone and find something exciting that is worth fighting for!

I hate the standard day jobs. I need excitement, a leadership role and global development path with coaching!

Anyone got that for me!? :lol:

I do know alot, but I don't know everthing....sigh ;)


Hey Rob,

If you’re a Dutch national, have you thought of joining the Dutch intelligence service? That’s a job full of intrigue and excitement, and you could ask for a field job covering Dubai and the Gulf. I don’t mean to be necessarily a spy but perhaps an analyst.

You seem to have a lot of enthusiasm and knowledge about the local issues over here, so why not put that to use?

Just a thought!!

8) 8)
Tom Jones
Dubai Forums Veteran
User avatar
Posts: 1367

  • Reply
Apr 11, 2009
Tom Jones wrote:
RobbyG wrote:I am ful of plans, the problem is...where to start without getting in that damn comfort zone and find something exciting that is worth fighting for!

I hate the standard day jobs. I need excitement, a leadership role and global development path with coaching!

Anyone got that for me!? :lol:

I do know alot, but I don't know everthing....sigh ;)


Hey Rob,

If you’re a Dutch national, have you thought of joining the Dutch intelligence service? That’s a job full of intrigue and excitement, and you could ask for a field job covering Dubai and the Gulf. I don’t mean to be necessarily a spy but perhaps an analyst.

You seem to have a lot of enthusiasm and knowledge about the local issues over here, so why not put that to use?

Just a thought!!

8) 8)


Already looked into that, but as far as I can tell, thats office based work and not that appealing since it is not a field job, but computer based intelligence mostly. the AIVD is not exactly the CIA or FBI where true action occurs in helicopters and naval vessles in the middle of the ocean. Now thats exciting!!

But I would settle with a flight test engineering job or perhaps a fleet engineering position for a business jet operator, or something in the likes of that.
RobbyG
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
Posts: 5927
Location: ---

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
I planned my 20s.
Ruskie
Dubai Forums Member
User avatar
Posts: 48

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
As one of my fav and very true saying goes

If you wanna make God laugh tell him your plans.

Personally everthing I have ever planned guess what never went according to plan, so I just gave up and go with the flow now and it hasn't been a bad ride till date. No complains
desertdudeshj
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
User avatar
Posts: 6258

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
smoggie wrote:I have never had a game plan. I've meandered through life without any real direction. I do have an overwhelming feeling of under achievement.

Should I have done things differently? Yes!


care to elaborate....
Misery Called Life
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 3033

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Like many, in my day (S&O's days :lol: ) I had plans to do this, that and the other.

However, through your life's journey things/$h1t happens and you have to adapt/change your previously made plans. Sometimes, those changes lead you down a totally different path to that which you wanted to take, and if you cannot change that path, then you will always wonder what "would have been" had you been able to change it.

No matter what is thrown at you, do not change your plans, unless you can come to terms with the consequences of what this new path will bring, never look back. There are always forks in the road, chosing either left or right depends on you, but don't regret anything, always look ahead.
yorky500
Dubai forums GURU
User avatar
Posts: 2050

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
have a friend, very canculated, in a good way, who has her life going by the book. nothing seems to happen to her by chance, and knowing her as well as I do, nothing is.

as for me, I never had a well formulated plan, yet so far what I wanted I got, sooner or later, one way or another. I guess it all depends on how realistic you plans are
raidah
Dubai Master of Thread Hijackers
User avatar
Posts: 1594

  • Reply
Re: To the aged/the experienced Apr 12, 2009
WhiteJade wrote:Have you always had a plan on how your life should be like, Or have you just gone wherever life led you?

Do we always need a plan?

Have you now become who you wanted to be when you were young? If yes, how did you make it?

Do the above questions make sense?


Too good!!!

Your first 2 questions can be combined for an answer. Where ur life leads, from there u shud plan. again for a short or longer period, life may seem normal. again life turns in its own way. You again need a NEW plan....Thatz life my pal!

Vera
Update with newzzzzz
vera.chandler
Dubai Forums Frequenter
User avatar
Posts: 108

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Most people here seem like me, they agree that long term plans rarely work. If that's so then much time, effort and sleep are wasted by many people on planning, so why do it? Some people even spend their lives making plans and never acting.

Tom Jones hit it spot on, the direction is important, not a plan. Most ambitions are achieved in baby steps, not grand plans.

If you're cheerful, moderately ambitious, open to change and not afraid to take chances then life will most likely be kind to you. If you have a personality that people generally like then even better.

Looking back and wondering 'what if' is a big mistake. Look forward, always. If you do look back only do it with affection and nostalgia (even for the bad times which are past), not thinking how your life could have been different if you had taken different choices. That's just negativity and is destructive to you. Even if your current situation is not the best, don't look back wishing.

LONG TERM plans are pointless for most people. Just live your life, go with what it brings, accept or reject as you think best (GRAB opportunities, they only come occasionally through life). Be kind to people, that always comes around again, even if not directly, then how you treat others affects how you feel about yourself. If you feel you need a change then DO IT. That's the big mistake people make, not acting on strong impulses. That's not planning, that's doing! I made that mistake myself and was LUCKY that circumstances forced me to make the change for the better that I had been contemplating for almost two years!

Last, if you make a mistake, don't waste time beating yourself up. Love yourself and forgive yourself, then move on with your life.
Speedhump
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 4262

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Great Advice speedhump, so ur saying act on your impulses, long term planning is just a waste of a lifetime..........cause ultimately it's all about the journey not the destination eh?

I getting this feeling I'm wasting my life, planning for my future, spending way too much time focussing on my career...for what? Some dollars in my wallet?
I love sports, adventure sports etc. I would probably be happiest as a coach or a PE teacher, or someone organizing mountain hiking/biking expeditions or sailing trips.
By profession I'm a finance guy, but it's just not satisfying....I'm in a quandry and just don't know what to do........
Misery Called Life
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 3033

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Speedhump, I applaud you. Obviously your insight comes from experience, which is the greatest teacher of life.

MCL: don't spend too much time asking yourself what if and looking back at yesterday, focus on today otherwise you can miss an opportunity of a life time.

I am very grateful for what I have today (which is by no means grand) but if it was gone tomorrow, I can go back to living with less. I encourage you to do what it is you want to do. There is nothing greater than to have a job that you really enjoy to the core. A job is a job, but to have one that you really enjoy makes is that much rewarding.

I had worked in a corporation where a lawyer on weekends was doing construction work, learning how to build houses. He resigned from the company and we found out that he was going to become a forest ranger. The reason he went into the construction was to learn how to build a house so that he could build his own log cabin. I asked him why and he replied: I became a lawyer because that is what my parents wanted me to be. I was a lawyer for ten years. Now I am going to do what I want to do for me.

If you really want to do something else then do it. If it doesn't work out at least you had the experience and it's one less thing you won't have to ask yourself "what if".

Good luck.

edited to add: See what kind of a response you can get when your post is readable?
Bora Bora
Dubai OverLord
User avatar
Posts: 8411
Location: At the moment Dubai Forums

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Misery Called Life wrote:Great Advice speedhump, so ur saying act on your impulses, long term planning is just a waste of a lifetime..........cause ultimately it's all about the journey not the destination eh?

I getting this feeling I'm wasting my life, planning for my future, spending way too much time focussing on my career...for what? Some dollars in my wallet?
I love sports, adventure sports etc. I would probably be happiest as a coach or a PE teacher, or someone organizing mountain hiking/biking expeditions or sailing trips.
By profession I'm a finance guy, but it's just not satisfying....I'm in a quandry and just don't know what to do........


Yes yes, the journey is all, some people love counting money so they will enjoy every day of being in finance, if you don't then what are you earning your crust in finance for, just saving it so you can buy something, a house, maybe a car. Meantime you are miserable. It's just not the same for eveyone. A friend of mine had a job just like mine (trading). But he hated it and now in his twenties he moved to the Far East and has become a dive instructor, completely out of the blue. I don't envy him because I'm happy as I am, but I'm over the moon for him because he realises that he needed to escape and he did it!
Speedhump
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 4262

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Bora Bora wrote:Speedhump, I applaud you. Obviously your insight comes from experience, which is the greatest teacher of life.

MCL: don't spend too much time asking yourself what if and looking back at yesterday, focus on today otherwise you can miss an opportunity of a life time.

I am very grateful for what I have today (which is by no means grand) but if it was gone tomorrow, I can go back to living with less. I encourage you to do what it is you want to do. There is nothing greater than to have a job that you really enjoy to the core. A job is a job, but to have one that you really enjoy makes is that much rewarding.

I had worked in a corporation where a lawyer on weekends was doing construction work, learning how to build houses. He resigned from the company and we found out that he was going to become a forest ranger. The reason he went into the construction was to learn how to build a house so that he could build his own log cabin. I asked him why and he replied: I became a lawyer because that is what my parents wanted me to be. I was a lawyer for ten years. Now I am going to do what I want to do for me.

If you really want to do something else then do it. If it doesn't work out at least you had the experience and it's one less thing you won't have to ask yourself "what if".

Good luck.

edited to add: See what kind of a response you can get when your post is readable?


Thanks dear. I think that maybe a lot of people in this current turmoil may find themselves being 'let go' by their employers and thinking 'what shall I do now?' While it's difficult to live on thin air, it must be a great opportunity to change the direction of your life if you're brave and have faith in yourself.
Speedhump
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 4262

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
On the positive side, if someone has work experience and decides to jump in with both feet and try something new, they always have their previous experience to fall back on.

We come into this world with nothing, and we live it with nothing. What is left in between is a journey.
Bora Bora
Dubai OverLord
User avatar
Posts: 8411
Location: At the moment Dubai Forums

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Bora Bora wrote:On the positive side, if someone has work experience and decides to jump in with both feet and try something new, they always have their previous experience to fall back on.

We come into this world with nothing, and we live it with nothing. What is left in between is a journey.


Problem is, where do you start your plan....I can't decide (bad leadership I know) :wink:
RobbyG
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
Posts: 5927
Location: ---

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
RobbyG wrote:
Bora Bora wrote:On the positive side, if someone has work experience and decides to jump in with both feet and try something new, they always have their previous experience to fall back on.

We come into this world with nothing, and we live it with nothing. What is left in between is a journey.


Problem is, where do you start your plan....I can't decide (bad leadership I know) :wink:


Don't worry about it too much things will happen when they are suppose to happen. You already have a vague direction that you want out of flatland keep working at it. Sooner or later something will pop along.
desertdudeshj
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
User avatar
Posts: 6258

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
desertdudeshj wrote:
RobbyG wrote:
Bora Bora wrote:On the positive side, if someone has work experience and decides to jump in with both feet and try something new, they always have their previous experience to fall back on.

We come into this world with nothing, and we live it with nothing. What is left in between is a journey.


Problem is, where do you start your plan....I can't decide (bad leadership I know) :wink:


Don't worry about it too much things will happen when they are suppose to happen. You already have a vague direction that you want out of flatland keep working at it. Sooner or later something will pop along.


Thats true. I just gotta take the step.

But what if I end up in England!!!? The horrrorrrr :lol: :wink:
RobbyG
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
Posts: 5927
Location: ---

  • Reply
Apr 12, 2009
Then better polish up on your " cocky " ;)
desertdudeshj
UAE, Dubai Forums Lord of the posts
User avatar
Posts: 6258

  • Reply
Apr 13, 2009
I believe you meant "cockney". Cocky is something else!
Bora Bora
Dubai OverLord
User avatar
Posts: 8411
Location: At the moment Dubai Forums

  • Reply
Re: To the aged/the experienced Apr 13, 2009
WhiteJade wrote:Have you always had a plan on how your life should be like, Or have you just gone wherever life led you?
Do we always need a plan?
Have you now become who you wanted to be when you were young? If yes, how did you make it?
Do the above questions make sense?

I had always been dreaming, wishing, planning, organizing, and securing most of the things: job, family, child, savings, etc. Though at the same time also to try to enjoy life while I'm still young enough: traveling, vacation, adventure, etc. I was at the top, having great job/position, family, and a pride for my parents & relatives.

Until last year and another at the beginning of this year, suddenly I had lost the two most important things of my life (besides God)... that had shattered me into pieces & my lowest condition. I had been questioning all the time... why?

Now I just live day by day, let it flow, no plans. Still struggling here and there, probably it'll take a lifetime as there's an "attachment" involved. I still believe God's plan and He would show me the way someday.

My favorite quote/lyrics, from "Beautiful Lie" by Yoav.
But in the blink of an eye, everything you ever knew can change.
And it’s a beautiful lie if you think everything will always stay the same.
xty
Dubai Forums Veteran
User avatar
Posts: 1144
Location: anywhere but Dubai

  • Reply
Re: To the aged/the experienced Apr 13, 2009
xty wrote:
WhiteJade wrote:Have you always had a plan on how your life should be like, Or have you just gone wherever life led you?
Do we always need a plan?
Have you now become who you wanted to be when you were young? If yes, how did you make it?
Do the above questions make sense?

I had always been dreaming, wishing, planning, organizing, and securing most of the things: job, family, child, savings, etc. Though at the same time also to try to enjoy life while I'm still young enough: traveling, vacation, adventure, etc. I was at the top, having great job/position, family, and a pride for my parents & relatives.

Until last year and another at the beginning of this year, suddenly I had lost the two most important things of my life (besides God)... that had shattered me into pieces & my lowest condition. I had been questioning all the time... why?

Now I just live day by day, let it flow, no plans. Still struggling here and there, probably it'll take a lifetime as there's an "attachment" involved. I still believe God's plan and He would show me the way someday.

My favorite quote/lyrics, from "Beautiful Lie" by Yoav.
But in the blink of an eye, everything you ever knew can change.
And it’s a beautiful lie if you think everything will always stay the same.


I am sorry to hear that sad story. Many of us will go our whole lives and never be tested like that. I hope you will heal eventually, they do say that time heals everything eventually, but that's one thing I am lucky enough never to have tested, yet. Your quote at the end of your post is something that we all should remember in our good times.
Speedhump
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 4262

  • Reply
Re: To the aged/the experienced Apr 13, 2009
xty wrote: I still believe God's plan and He would show me the way someday.

My favorite quote/lyrics, from "Beautiful Lie" by Yoav.
But in the blink of an eye, everything you ever knew can change.
And it’s a beautiful lie if you think everything will always stay the same.


That was poignant.
Misery Called Life
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 3033

  • Reply
Apr 13, 2009
Bora Bora wrote:Speedhump, I applaud you. Obviously your insight comes from experience, which is the greatest teacher of life.

MCL: don't spend too much time asking yourself what if and looking back at yesterday, focus on today otherwise you can miss an opportunity of a life time.

I am very grateful for what I have today (which is by no means grand) but if it was gone tomorrow, I can go back to living with less. I encourage you to do what it is you want to do. There is nothing greater than to have a job that you really enjoy to the core. A job is a job, but to have one that you really enjoy makes is that much rewarding.

I had worked in a corporation where a lawyer on weekends was doing construction work, learning how to build houses. He resigned from the company and we found out that he was going to become a forest ranger. The reason he went into the construction was to learn how to build a house so that he could build his own log cabin. I asked him why and he replied: I became a lawyer because that is what my parents wanted me to be. I was a lawyer for ten years. Now I am going to do what I want to do for me.

If you really want to do something else then do it. If it doesn't work out at least you had the experience and it's one less thing you won't have to ask yourself "what if".

Good luck.

edited to add: See what kind of a response you can get when your post is readable?


Bora nice words.
It's funny how on a forum with absolute strangers one can actually get some good advice...I can imagine going to ma pop and tellin him that I'd like to be a coach, He'd be livid he'd say " So now u want to ba a coach, why don't you make up your mind.....before so much money was spent on your education?....Besides what next a bus driver? I'll be the laughing stock of the county...." :lol:
Seriously......
Misery Called Life
Dubai Forums Zealot
User avatar
Posts: 3033

posting in Dubai General ChatForum Rules

Return to Dubai General Chat


  • Related topics
    Replies
    Last post
cron