Why Is It Hard To Find Good Friends Here?

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Why is it hard to find good friends here? Apr 01, 2009
Am I the only one or has anyone else found it really hard to make good friends here? I have been here for 5 whole years and I do not have one single true friend. Almost all the people I know like to chat crap about others and are too concerned with seeming "cooler" than the next guy to even worry about true friendships. I keep coming across back stabbers and totally fake and superficial people.I've met quite a few people from many different places but they all seem to have the same retarded attitude. I know there is nothing wrong with me because I have tons of friends back home. Has anyone else experienced the same or am I the one who's doing something wrong :?:

magenta
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Apr 01, 2009
By the grace of God I have been truly blessed with really good friends. Friends I can literally can depend on with my life. I could be on the Saudi border in the middle of the night and all I have to do is make a call and I know for sure there will be people comming in case i have any problem. They are more to me than friends and closer to me than my own brothers. And trust me there have been worse situations. Without my friends I would be truly lost in this world let alone this place. A few I grew up with and a few I know from my adulthood. And also made some good buddies from my offroading ventures.

True there are a lot of plastic people in this place and like you said most are into the bling bling and back biting. Maybe your hanging with the wrong crowd, need to look into places where you can meet new people. I don't think you'll really meet "true" friends at clubs and bars here if thats where your hanging out most of the time.

I don't know you so would be totally wrong for me to judge you or your character but maybe there are some flaws within you that drive away " good " people. Now don't take this as an attack just saying maybe worth looking into. You know yourselve best.

Cheers
desertdudeshj
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Apr 01, 2009
I don't even go to clubs or bars lol. Most of the people I know here I met at school :\ I am an extremely shy person and I tend to make friends with quiet and easy going people. Maybe I should look into myself a bit more...
magenta
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Apr 01, 2009
Maybe you can try to meet a group of friends by common interests instead of just a general social crowd that might be a bit cliquey. Sometimes it is easier to bond and make a more genuine friendship when you have more things in common. Also, Dubai and other places with lots of expats have the problem of people not wanting to get too attached to others because people are constantly coming and going. Maybe some don't want to put themselves out there because it hurts when good friends have to leave.
kanelli
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Apr 01, 2009
I definitely have real friends, but these people are the ones I've been sharing sincere friendship with when we were all in our origin.

I know some few here, but have doubts on their sincerity. I wish to avoid mentioning the incidents however those were degrading. I believe friends should be there not thru thick n thin, but thru thin and thinner!

Magenta, I can be your friend...let's not try it...it will happen!
andz_zmzn
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Apr 01, 2009
It does take a long time here unfortunately.
Chocoholic
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Apr 01, 2009
My words from Magenta. Two years is not a short period but didn't find a sincere friend here whose mind can match with me. Yes it doesn’t mean that a person whom you are talking and going out is a friend. My expectations about a friend is different. Hope the best the right and sincere friend.
Anosh
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Re: Why is it hard to find good friends here? Apr 01, 2009
Do you hang too much with people from New Dubai?
gtmash
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Apr 01, 2009
desertdudeshj wrote:By the grace of God I have been truly blessed with really good friends. Friends I can literally can depend on with my life. I could be on the Saudi border in the middle of the night and all I have to do is make a call and I know for sure there will be people comming in case i have any problem. They are more to me than friends and closer to me than my own brothers. And trust me there have been worse situations. Without my friends I would be truly lost in this world let alone this place. A few I grew up with and a few I know from my adulthood. And also made some good buddies from my offroading ventures.


U r a lucky guy! I envy u!
Misery Called Life
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Apr 02, 2009
Yeah I know....maybe i'm just a good judge of character ?
desertdudeshj
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Re: Why is it hard to find good friends here? Apr 02, 2009
magenta wrote:I keep coming across back stabbers and totally fake and superficial people.

gtmash wrote:Do you hang too much with people from New Dubai?

Ha ha, very subtle :lol:

magenta wrote:Am I the only one or has anyone else found it really hard to make good friends here? I have been here for 5 whole years and I do not have one single true friend.

There are good people here, but they dont' show themselves off. And if you're a good person then the flash gits will hunt you down and be your new best friend until they get bored or someone buys them a bigger drink.

What about sports or hobby clubs? I assume in 5 years you probably tried that?
bonk
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Apr 03, 2009
Hey Same here!!......... Still alone n no freind's!!..... Ahhhhh!! I wish to have one atlest!!......................
Sharp
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Apr 03, 2009
Sharp wrote:Hey Same here!!......... Still alone n no freind's!!..... Ahhhhh!! I wish to have one atlest!!......................


Find me an aero engineering career option and you have one friend thats coming to Dubai !!!

Probably with a baked in salary cut at this point in time... ;) Ahh thats what negotiations are for! :wink:
RobbyG
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Apr 04, 2009
RobbyG wrote:
Sharp wrote:Hey Same here!!......... Still alone n no freind's!!..... Ahhhhh!! I wish to have one atlest!!......................


Find me an aero engineering career option and you have one friend thats coming to Dubai !!!

Probably with a baked in salary cut at this point in time... ;) Ahh thats what negotiations are for! :wink:


Robby are you actually looking for one here ? or hoping somebody will just knock on your door one day and beg you to come down to dubai and join them !
desertdudeshj
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Apr 04, 2009
I definately was. Had about 10 companies in the UAE that I applied for. No succes or any replies!, so I can't find any more.

I do need to move on to the next effort, because it looks like they offer plenty of engineering jobs in Dubai and surrounding emirates, but they don't reply at all!!!

Very unprofessional if you ask me. Or they are keeping up appearances just like Emirates/Dnata is doing. I think I applied for 3 jobs there, still no reply.
The problem is you can't call them. You have to apply on-line...

Any tips, always welcome.
RobbyG
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Apr 04, 2009
RobbyG, why do you want to work in Dubai anyway?
kanelli
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Apr 04, 2009
Well, other than it being a great challenge for me to live there and get out of 'the arranged' Holland thing,... its change!

You should know that I'm not only looking for Dubai. I applied in Schwitzerland, Sharjah, Abu Dhabi, Caribbean...but those markets are very small for aviation compared to countries like England, Germany, France and the Netherlands.

I probably have to be less focussed on the UAE/Dubai. Times are tough these days.

I think I should refocus a bit more on solid ground during this volatile economic downturn. But I ain't leaving DF, gives me a good laugh now and then.

Lets keep it that way shall we!
RobbyG
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Apr 05, 2009
Well I could gain one friend within 3 years and a half its good … but I really feel that I need a really good friend but I don’t know how or where… this is really giving me a crappy mood these days; and the fact that I don’t know how to make friends is making it worse … so any suggestions people other than clubbing or going to bars or these places that I can’t go to alone :) ?
Najla.S
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Apr 06, 2009
Najla.S wrote:Well I could gain one friend within 3 years and a half its good … but I really feel that I need a really good friend but I don’t know how or where… this is really giving me a crappy mood these days; and the fact that I don’t know how to make friends is making it worse … so any suggestions people other than clubbing or going to bars or these places that I can’t go to alone :) ?


bars and clubs are not where real friends are made.
gtmash
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Apr 06, 2009
gtmash wrote:
Najla.S wrote:Well I could gain one friend within 3 years and a half its good … but I really feel that I need a really good friend but I don’t know how or where… this is really giving me a crappy mood these days; and the fact that I don’t know how to make friends is making it worse … so any suggestions people other than clubbing or going to bars or these places that I can’t go to alone :) ?


bars and clubs are not where real friends are made.


It is in Holland. Comradry eventually leads to friendship, but it can take a long time. Depends on what you got to offer. Comes two ways. :idea:
RobbyG
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Apr 06, 2009
Najla.S wrote:Well I could gain one friend within 3 years and a half its good … but I really feel that I need a really good friend but I don’t know how or where… this is really giving me a crappy mood these days; and the fact that I don’t know how to make friends is making it worse … so any suggestions people other than clubbing or going to bars or these places that I can’t go to alone :) ?


Well I guess some of us are blessed. I don't at all find it hard to make friends. Try to socialise more( and no I don't mean clubs and Bars ). Office parties, BBQ's etc etc. Don't be the one "hangingon the wall" don't be too conscious of what people will think of you. Be yourself anyhow if you do want any real friends you want them to like you for the "real " you now don't you. Go out and mingle.

Another thing, people with not too many friends are usually who drive other people away. They find faults with everyone and everyone. He talks too much ! He's always making bad jokes ! She's too weird !!! Learn to look at people for who they are and not what they are.

Some people won't socialise or make friends with people in a lower state than them " finacially " Also some will only make friends or look for people of their own nationality.

I have friends and I mean good real good friends ranging from panel beaters and mechanics to multi millionare real estate agents and property developers ( Although they are in a bit of a bind right now lol ) ranging in nationality Literally from N. America to the far east and everything in between.

There are good people everywhere here in Dubai, U.A.E. You just need to let your guard down a bit a look. Make friends with everyone and anyone. Don't keep on waiting looking for the "right" ones. Some might be plastic, egoistic, materialistic etc etc but very soon you will find out who they are and you can then screen out the good apples from the bad ones .
desertdudeshj
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