Hey all ....
I have had this concern for quite some time, and I stumbled upon the forum by chance.
I'm a 26 year-old Dutch lady,a psychologist, and I have recently found a nice job in Dubai. I moved to DXB last month. The main reason I moved to Dubai, when I have never resided outside The Netherlands before, is because of my fiance, who is a Syrian national.
Well I've gotten over the initial disbelief/denial, and moved on to anger and disappointment concerning the so-called "Western" community in Dubai.
Let me clarify:
My fiance is a junior doctor, and quite a good-looker, with a nice sense of fashion and style .... nevertheless:
1-I get frowned upon by at least half the "Westerners" I meet in malls and bars, who see me holding hands ...etc, with my fiance.
2-The people (South-African, Aussie, Brits and some other Europeans) at my workplace haven't stopped bombarding me with "advice" on dealing with "The Arabs" and how an Arab man can never be right for a european lady like me.
3-These same people (and many more, even if it's someone I've just met) keep on hinting at some "Unwritten rules" governing the behaviour of "Westerners" in Dubai, such as : "Avoid mingling with Arabs, unless they exhibit a clear and blatant pro-western lifestyle and thought" and "we should preserve the western community in Dubai" ....etc
4-Most European men I've met, act as if I'm fair game to them, as if being taken by an Arab man basically means that I'm single. The people I share a villa with in The Springs, keep on "introducing" (rather setting me up) with these single european guys, of which I see a new face every few days with a fancy car parked outside. It almost seems that being with an Arab man instigates something in westerners here., because I cab't imagine that the same would happen if I were with one of my "kind" ... i.e : a blonde-blue-eyed Dutchman.
5-Upon trying to argue all of the crap above, and letting people know what a wonderful man my fiance is, and how democratic and tolerant we should be, I'm not even given the time of the day for a reply, I just get frowned upon, and sad head-shakes by these people.
6-And ultimately when it seemed obvious that I wasn't about to let people who barely know me, influence my opinion on my fiance, I was "outcasted" from that "community", although I've had no direct confrontation, and regard myself as a very easy-going person and easy to get a long with.
It's as if going out/getting engaged to an Arab man is a slap in the face of a meticulously orchestrated "Western community" in Dubai.
I have been warned, by my fiance, and by other people, about this. But I just refused to believe that people who are tolerant and open-minded in their countries, can just turn into biased racists elsewhere, but sadly, it seems true.
I have a million incidents and stories to tell. From old Brit ladies in the ladies room telling me that I shouldn't hang out with an Arab, to Club bouncers in prestigious club to deny me and my fiance entrance with an obvious look of on their face......
The funny/sad thing is that it all seems to be under the surface .... Nobody ever talks about it. And most of those I met who have stayed in Dubai for some time, just follow the herd ....
What the hell??