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That would still be bearable if they could stop staring at your girl like a starved jackal stares at a steak. We caught a pack once surrounding a girl who was alone in the pool, until her boyfriend - a rather big guy - showed up and they all fled like, you guessed it, jackals.
(quote taken from another thread)


Dont they have women in their own country.

Obviously there are deprived...Although truth is, when I walk on the streets of Dubai and men look at my girl, I do feel a bit proud.
Also bad is, that lately the gay community in Dubai seems to get aggresive and start touching you without any reason given. That´s what is really upsetting me!

gezza wrote:Dont they have women in their own country.

They do have women in their own country. The thing is, they are not allowed to bring their women here with them. Minimum salary cap and all.

I wouldn't say GAY COMMUNITY mate......I would say just deprived Pakistanis.
as for proud!!!?...
Makes me feel violated.
Espically when they stare at my daughter.

gtmash wrote:

gezza wrote:Dont they have women in their own country.

They do have women in their own country. The thing is, they are not allowed to bring their women here with them. Minimum salary cap and all.

Still gives them no right to make my wife feel uncomfortable.

gezza wrote:Espically when they stare at my daughter.

I am not sure where the daughter came in, but I meant my girlfriend.
My point is, there is a difference between hungry eyes (which are offending) and a small headturn. With the latter I have no problems. And yes, I rather see a small headturn than instantaneously puking!

Flying Dutchman wrote:My point is, there is a difference between hungry eyes (which are offending) and a small headturn. With the latter I have no problems. And yes, I rather see a small headturn than instantaneously puking!

So, let me get this straight, other men admiring your girlfriend is ok - it's just the extent of the lust they have for her that they show in public that offends you.

It's ok to have an extended look and assess her attributes (that she's a looker rather than a minger - for example). It's ok for them to say to themselves at that moment 'tasty', 'I wouldn't say no' or something similar.

However if they stare as if the sight of a woman is something alien to them in their day to day lives, this causes offence.

Have I got that right?



Cheers,
Shafique

An extended look would offend me, not a headturn. So I would agree with your statement if you replace extended look with a small headturn. Then they can briefly assess what ever they want...

Put ur daughter , girl friend or wife in black veil

There r so many suicide bombers in Pakistan , can we not express our feeling abroad?
I have x-raw machine in my eyes and i always look at girls as i am gonna eat them

gezza wrote:I wouldn't say GAY COMMUNITY mate......I would say just deprived Pakistanis.
as for proud!!!?...
Makes me feel violated.
Espically when they stare at my daughter.

How do u know if someone is Pakistani ? Are Pakistani people having "PAK number plate" ?

Its indian people , am i right Jits ?

HP, thank you so much for your constructive contributions!

shafique wrote:So, let me get this straight, other men admiring your girlfriend is ok - it's just the extent of the lust they have for her that they show in public that offends you.

It's ok to have an extended look and assess her attributes (that she's a looker rather than a minger - for example). It's ok for them to say to themselves at that moment 'tasty', 'I wouldn't say no' or something similar.

However if they stare as if the sight of a woman is something alien to them in their day to day lives, this causes offence.

Have I got that right?



Cheers,
Shafique

I guess it's just another one of those very personal things. Because what Dutchman wrote sounds perfectly acceptable to me!

Men look or check-out women, women do the same. But there are degrees of obviousness. There is a way to do it...

The feeling of pride which a man gets when he knows that his wife or gf is viewed as attractive by other males - and even women - is a perfectly natural one, in western society at least (I will admit that things might change a little in Eastern or more conservative parts of the world). Any guy being honest for a second will admit as much. It is an ego boost, and something very primal too...

But going back to what is actually acceptable - a nod/word passed between a bunch of guys, a 'longer than usual' glance, a sucking in of breath...these happen every day. I don't think many blokes get put out by it.

But at some undefinable point, a line can be crossed and the behaviour we are talking about becomes offensive - perhaps it's when that 'casual' look turns into a full five minute stare? Or maybe at the start of a more raucous laughter/slapping of backs etc between a bunch of blokes? Or could it be the famous cat whistle?

I'm not entirely sure. That's why I will admit - it can be a very personal issue, what the individual finds offensive.

But in general, I think there are some very broad guidelines/boundaries which are shared by quite a few men...

gezza wrote:That would still be bearable if they could stop staring at your girl like a starved jackal stares at a steak. We caught a pack once surrounding a girl who was alone in the pool, until her boyfriend - a rather big guy - showed up and they all fled like, you guessed it, jackals.
(quote taken from another thread)


Dont they have women in their own country.

Thats what happens when u go for a stoll through a labour camp!

Dubaidude007 wrote:

gezza wrote:That would still be bearable if they could stop staring at your girl like a starved jackal stares at a steak. We caught a pack once surrounding a girl who was alone in the pool, until her boyfriend - a rather big guy - showed up and they all fled like, you guessed it, jackals.
(quote taken from another thread)


Dont they have women in their own country.

Thats what happens when u go for a stoll through a labour camp!

Yeah, the labour camp called Dubai.

It is a fact that every man and woman will check out another man or woman they find attractive. It can be a beautiful face or beautiful body, whatever! I've double-taken a look at handsome men or beautiful women in dishdashas and abayyas. I completely agree that taking a look should be discreet and tasteful - just use your peripheral vision or make more frequent glances. All out staring for a long time, and most definitely physically getting close to the person etc. is absolutely rude. Quite a few men in Dubai are very basic when it comes to manners and they are incapable of being discreet. I've seen guy ma.st.ur.bating in front of my car in the Mall of Emirates parking garage, so lots of pent up s.e.x.ual frustration to be found in Dubai I guess

On one hand I sympathise, on the other I'm not sure.

A lot of these guys see their family once a year if they're lucky, and sometimes it can be very hard to fight the primal urges. On the other hand, people need to control themselves, or be kept in control.

I feel uncomfortable sometimes if guys stare at my girlfriend, but I don't dwell on it as firstly, I doubt she's going to all of a sudden run off with them, and secondly, it is really not doing any harm at all... god knows I've seen some beautiful women in my life.

However, were it to go any further, if they touched her... I'd snap their arms off. In a nice way.

burton wrote:
The feeling of pride which a man gets when he knows that his wife or gf is viewed as attractive by other males - and even women - is a perfectly natural one, in western society at least (I will admit that things might change a little in Eastern or more conservative parts of the world). Any guy being honest for a second will admit as much. It is an ego boost, and something very primal too...
....

But in general, I think there are some very broad guidelines/boundaries which are shared by quite a few men...

I totally agree with you - and you have summed it up well.

It +is+ the norm in many societies to take pride in the appearance of your woman and feel pride when they attract positive attention from other men and women. You are also right that some other societies this is not the norm and what provides an ego boost will be viewed differently in these other societies.

Kanelli is also totally right to say that all humans are naturally attracted to the beauties of others. We all programmed to find others attractive. Advertisers know this all too well.

At the end of the day, these are matters of choice and custom - I can choose whether to ogle or not, and we all can choose the extent to which we display our natural beauties.

I was just interested here in the view that it is the degree of attention that causes offence and not that others may be attracted to one's woman. I'm not a woman, so can't comment on whether this view is tantamount to objectification of women (as possessions to be flaunted), but would imagine that for some women it would be.


Cheers,
Shafique

This is a problem in Dubai that is hard to address. I agree with the posters who say it is hard on these single men because they are away from their families and give in to basic primal urges. It is one thing to give someone a quick admiring glance or a once over- this can be flaterring but to out right leer is a completely different animal.

I just can't imagine being so hard up (no pun intended) to loose any basic senses of morality and acceptable public behaviour. What Kaneli described about the guy mas**rbating in fromt of her car, should be a criminal offense, I bet if you had reported him it would have been.

kanelli wrote:It is a fact that every man and woman will check out another man or woman they find attractive. It can be a beautiful face or beautiful body, whatever! I've double-taken a look at handsome men or beautiful women in dishdashas and abayyas. I completely agree that taking a look should be discreet and tasteful - just use your peripheral vision or make more frequent glances. All out staring for a long time, and most definitely physically getting close to the person etc. is absolutely rude. Quite a few men in Dubai are very basic when it comes to manners and they are incapable of being discreet. I've seen guy ma.st.ur.bating in front of my car in the Mall of Emirates parking garage, so lots of pent up s.e.x.ual frustration to be found in Dubai I guess

Must be a hot car. Is it a Corolla 2008?

shafique wrote:

burton wrote:
The feeling of pride which a man gets when he knows that his wife or gf is viewed as attractive by other males - and even women - is a perfectly natural one, in western society at least (I will admit that things might change a little in Eastern or more conservative parts of the world). Any guy being honest for a second will admit as much. It is an ego boost, and something very primal too...
....

But in general, I think there are some very broad guidelines/boundaries which are shared by quite a few men...

I totally agree with you - and you have summed it up well.

It +is+ the norm in many societies to take pride in the appearance of your woman and feel pride when they attract positive attention from other men and women. You are also right that some other societies this is not the norm and what provides an ego boost will be viewed differently in these other societies.

Kanelli is also totally right to say that all humans are naturally attracted to the beauties of others. We all programmed to find others attractive. Advertisers know this all too well.

At the end of the day, these are matters of choice and custom - I can choose whether to ogle or not, and we all can choose the extent to which we display our natural beauties.

I was just interested here in the view that it is the degree of attention that causes offence and not that others may be attracted to one's woman. I'm not a woman, so can't comment on whether this view is tantamount to objectification of women (as possessions to be flaunted), but would imagine that for some women it would be.


Cheers,
Shafique

I bet a girlfriend or wife of a super hot/rich n powerful guy would feel the same when her guy is at the receiving end of ogling. Now let me ask how many of us men dont like strutting it around... or should that guy be behind the black clothes as well?

dup post

St.Lucifer wrote:
I bet a girlfriend or wife of a super hot/rich n powerful guy would feel the same when her guy is at the receiving end of ogling. Now let me ask how many of us men dont like strutting it around... or should that guy be behind the black clothes as well?

Well, typically the cultures who do encourage modest dress apply the same modesty to men as well.

On the point that women will be just as proud to show off their men..I've read though that women are more possessive and aren't too happy with younger, fitter or more attractive women checking out their husbands... but then again, I'm not a woman.

Cheers,
Shafique

shafique wrote:

St.Lucifer wrote:
I bet a girlfriend or wife of a super hot/rich n powerful guy would feel the same when her guy is at the receiving end of ogling. Now let me ask how many of us men dont like strutting it around... or should that guy be behind the black clothes as well?

Well, typically the cultures who do encourage modest dress apply the same modesty to men as well.

On the point that women will be just as proud to show off their men..I've read though that women are more possessive and aren't too happy with younger, fitter or more attractive women checking out their husbands... but then again, I'm not a woman.

Cheers,
Shafique

I bet they are, but would it not increase the frustration and lure to see what shouldnt be seen ?? the eternal adam n eve theroy?
People will still have to restrain themselves to not look on to things that they shouldnt.

gezza wrote:That would still be bearable if they could stop staring at your girl like a starved jackal stares at a steak. We caught a pack once surrounding a girl who was alone in the pool, until her boyfriend - a rather big guy - showed up and they all fled like, you guessed it, jackals.
(quote taken from another thread)


Dont they have women in their own country.

well a counter argument can be that ur wife, girlfriend, mistress or/and daughter should dress up more conservatively next time they go out. u live in a conservative society in case u didnt know.

ofcourse theyr gonna react the way they react because it is foreign to them and it sends them a lot of mixed signals. their only interaction with white naked women are thru movies and magazines.

but then again i find ur metaphor quite a racist one. i think wetsren men are the real jackasses jackals. because if we take for granted men's testosteronic aggression anywhere in the word, by proportionate misbehavior, wetsren men will top the categories of rape crimes, criminalities, dometic violence...etc?

Some interesting points you raise indeed Yeats. Although I am far from conservative, sometimes when I see women in Dubai, I think "you really shouldn´t dress this way", because I see it can be very offensive according to local culture. The thread started however with an example of a woman sitting near the pool. Or do you also imply that all women should wear burqini´s there? The pool is a closed place and you can decide to go there or not...
As for Western men. What is according to you a Western man? Somebody living in a Western country? Than you are most probably right. Or somebody from a Western background? Than you are wrong I think.

Flying Dutchman wrote:Some interesting points you raise indeed Yeats. Although I am far from conservative, sometimes when I see women in Dubai, I think "you really shouldn´t dress this way", because I see it can be very offensive according to local culture. The thread started however with an example of a woman sitting near the pool. Or do you also imply that all women should wear burqini´s there? The pool is a closed place and you can decide to go there or not...
As for Western men. What is according to you a Western man? Somebody living in a Western country? Than you are most probably right. Or somebody from a Western background? Than you are wrong I think.

quite certainly i dont expect burqas in swimming pools ... i dont know what i can suggest in such a situation except being understanding from the prey's side (however ridiculous that may sound) and a slap on the face for the 'jackal'.. there isnt a great way of accepting both as they r opposing lifestyles.

No one individual can expect to please everyone...either way its just a matter of live and let live.....

Yeats wrote:

gezza wrote:That would still be bearable if they could stop staring at your girl like a starved jackal stares at a steak. We caught a pack once surrounding a girl who was alone in the pool, until her boyfriend - a rather big guy - showed up and they all fled like, you guessed it, jackals.
(quote taken from another thread)


Dont they have women in their own country.

well a counter argument can be that ur wife, girlfriend, mistress or/and daughter should dress up more conservatively next time they go out. u live in a conservative society in case u didnt know.

read this....
I've seen guy ma.st.ur.bating in front of my car in the Mall of Emirates parking garage, so lots of pent up s.e.x.ual frustration to be found in Dubai I guess .

my point proven.??

That would still be bearable if they could stop staring at your girl like a starved jackal stares at a steak. We caught a pack once surrounding a girl who was alone in the pool, until her boyfriend - a rather big guy - showed up and they all fled like, you guessed it, jackals.
(quote taken from another thread)

Haha yeah, I'm the one who wrote that a while back in a Wild Wadi thread.

Where is this pool in which random groups of men can freely enter? I'd like to go there.