Dubai Forums Dubai Discussions Dubai General Chat

**Divorce: Future tense of marriage.



**Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.



**Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".



**Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.



**Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.



**Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power.



**Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.



**Classic: books that people praise, but do not read.



**Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.



**Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.



**Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.



**Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.



**Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.



**Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.



**Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.



**Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.



**Opportunist: A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally falls into a river.



**Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See, I am not injured yet."



**Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.



**Father: A banker provided by nature.



**Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.



**Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.



**Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
***********************************

sage & onion wrote:**Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.

Ouch, u will get alot of comments on this one

Yeah, like:

Sage & Onion : something you shove up a turkey's backside

( sorry, Sage - couldn't resist ) :

sauron wrote:Yeah, like:

Sage & Onion : something you shove up a turkey's backside

( sorry, Sage - couldn't resist ) :

lmao

i know the feminist force in here would kill me for this but neways

Kiss: An application at the headquarters for entry at the base.

* goes underground

sauron wrote:Yeah, like:

Sage & Onion : something you shove up a turkey's backside

( sorry, Sage - couldn't resist ) :

Hahahahahahahaha

so...these aren't real definitions from the dictionary?

bushra21 wrote:so...these aren't real definitions from the dictionary?

Hi Bushra, you mean you don't have the latest copy, sorry

they're real? i didnt know that

never mind...sage, that wasn't very nice

bushra21 wrote:never mind...sage, that wasn't very nice

What wasnt my dear?, you gotta laugh though

After sitting in a two hour conference call 'Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present. ' made me chuckle.