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Sardar Jokes
- wishmaster
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Two Sardarjis (pilots) try to land an airplane in the
states.They start descending and as they touch
the ground the pilot screamed "the runway is ending...".
The second pilot swiftly gets the plane back up in the air...
They make a big turn and start descending again. The moment they
touch the ground, the pilot scream again "Get the plane up, the
runaway is ending...". The second pilot swiftly gets the plane back
up in the air... They make a big turn and start descending again... This
goes on again and again... During their fourth descent the pilot
says:"Look at those stupid Americans, they build this huge & expensive
airport but with such a short runaway..", ""I know"
answers the second pilot, "But look how wide they made it....
states.They start descending and as they touch
the ground the pilot screamed "the runway is ending...".
The second pilot swiftly gets the plane back up in the air...
They make a big turn and start descending again. The moment they
touch the ground, the pilot scream again "Get the plane up, the
runaway is ending...". The second pilot swiftly gets the plane back
up in the air... They make a big turn and start descending again... This
goes on again and again... During their fourth descent the pilot
says:"Look at those stupid Americans, they build this huge & expensive
airport but with such a short runaway..", ""I know"
answers the second pilot, "But look how wide they made it....
- wishmaster
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A sardar walked up to the front desk of the library and
said,"I borrowed a book last week, but it was the
most boring I've ever read. There was no story
whatsoever, and there were far too many characters!"
The librarian replied, "Oh, you must be the person who
took our phone book."
said,"I borrowed a book last week, but it was the
most boring I've ever read. There was no story
whatsoever, and there were far too many characters!"
The librarian replied, "Oh, you must be the person who
took our phone book."
- wishmaster
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BEPPO SINGH'S MOTHER DIED.
Beppo Singh: (crying) the doctor called, my mother is dead.
Friend: condolence, my friend.
After 2 minutes Beppo Singh cries even louder
Friend: what now?
Beppo Singh: my sister just called, her mother died too!
Beppo Singh: (crying) the doctor called, my mother is dead.
Friend: condolence, my friend.
After 2 minutes Beppo Singh cries even louder
Friend: what now?
Beppo Singh: my sister just called, her mother died too!
- wishmaster
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Dear Receiver,
You have just received a Sardarji virus. Since we are not so
technologically advanced, this is a MANUAL virus. Please delete all
the files on your hard disk yourself and send this email to everyone you know.
Thank you very much for helping me.
DHAKKAN SINGH HACKER
You have just received a Sardarji virus. Since we are not so
technologically advanced, this is a MANUAL virus. Please delete all
the files on your hard disk yourself and send this email to everyone you know.
Thank you very much for helping me.
DHAKKAN SINGH HACKER
- iceman
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Banta Singh finished his English exam and came out.
His friends asked him how did he do his exam, for that he replied
"Exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought
and at last I wrote
THUNK!!!"
His friends asked him how did he do his exam, for that he replied
"Exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought
and at last I wrote
THUNK!!!"
- wishmaster
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Jasmeet Kaur caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all
around his living room.
Jasmeet: "What are you searching for?"
Santa: "Hidden cameras!"
Jasmeet: "And what makes you think that there are
hidden cameras here?"
Santa: "That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing.
Why every few minutes he keeps saying,
'You are watching the Star World channel'.
How does he know that?"
around his living room.
Jasmeet: "What are you searching for?"
Santa: "Hidden cameras!"
Jasmeet: "And what makes you think that there are
hidden cameras here?"
Santa: "That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing.
Why every few minutes he keeps saying,
'You are watching the Star World channel'.
How does he know that?"
- wishmaster
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One Singh was enjoying the sun at the beach in America.
A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing?"
Singh answered, " No, I am Banta Singh."
Another guy came and asked the him the same question.
Singh answered, "No! No! Me Banta Singh!"
A third one came and asked him the same question again.
Singh was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place.
While walking he saw another Singh soaking in the sun. He went up to him and
asked,
"Are you Relaxing?"
The other Singh was a lot more educated and answered,
"Yes, I am relaxing."
The Singh slapped him on his face and said,
"Stupid, idiot. Everyone is looking for you and you are sitting over here!"
A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing?"
Singh answered, " No, I am Banta Singh."
Another guy came and asked the him the same question.
Singh answered, "No! No! Me Banta Singh!"
A third one came and asked him the same question again.
Singh was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place.
While walking he saw another Singh soaking in the sun. He went up to him and
asked,
"Are you Relaxing?"
The other Singh was a lot more educated and answered,
"Yes, I am relaxing."
The Singh slapped him on his face and said,
"Stupid, idiot. Everyone is looking for you and you are sitting over here!"
- wishmaster
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Hey Wishmaster, is your name Singh by any chance??, you seem to know a hell of a lot of them 
- sage & onion
- Dubai Shadow Wolf
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sage & onion wrote:Hey Wishmaster, is your name Singh by any chance??, you seem to know a hell of a lot of them
no one of my ex gf was singh
- wishmaster
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Wishmaster,
that has got to be the worst collection of jokes I have ever, ever had the experience of reading.
Do not give up your day time job, please.
that has got to be the worst collection of jokes I have ever, ever had the experience of reading.
Do not give up your day time job, please.
- yorky500
- Dubai forums GURU
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yorky500 wrote:Wishmaster,
that has got to be the worst collection of jokes I have ever, ever had the experience of reading.
Do not give up your day time job, please.
see because of me your having new experiences in you life
- wishmaster
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wishmaster wrote:yorky500 wrote:Wishmaster,
that has got to be the worst collection of jokes I have ever, ever had the experience of reading.
Do not give up your day time job, please.
see because of me your having new experiences in you life
Nar, you are not one of them.
now wish-off.
- yorky500
- Dubai forums GURU
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yorky500 wrote:wishmaster wrote:yorky500 wrote:Wishmaster,
that has got to be the worst collection of jokes I have ever, ever had the experience of reading.
Do not give up your day time job, please.
see because of me your having new experiences in you life
Nar, you are not one of them.
now wish-off.
first make up your mind and then write. Your avatar shows that you are confused about many things;) ha ha ha.
dunt change your words after every single post. be a man if you really are
ha ha ha
- wishmaster
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One day sardarji was sitting in his office on the
thirteenth floor of a building when a man came running
in to his office and shouted "Santa singh your daughter
Preeto just died in an accident" Sardarji was in panic.
Not knowing what to do he jumped from his office window while
coming down when he was near the tenth floor he remembered he
didn't have a daughter named preeto.
When he was near the fifth floor he remembered he was not
married.When he was about to hit the ground he remembered
he was not Santa Singh.
thirteenth floor of a building when a man came running
in to his office and shouted "Santa singh your daughter
Preeto just died in an accident" Sardarji was in panic.
Not knowing what to do he jumped from his office window while
coming down when he was near the tenth floor he remembered he
didn't have a daughter named preeto.
When he was near the fifth floor he remembered he was not
married.When he was about to hit the ground he remembered
he was not Santa Singh.
- wishmaster
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Sardar enters kitchen and opens the sugarbox. Sees inside and closes it. Wife observes the whole episode.Again he comes and does the same stuff. Wife askes Why are you doing this? Sardar replies: Doc told to check sugar level regularly
- wishmaster
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Sardar jee went to Russia n ask from a Girl
sardar jee: Can you speak english
Girl: Yes
Sardar jee: how much
Girl: Just 50$
sardar jee: Can you speak english
Girl: Yes
Sardar jee: how much
Girl: Just 50$
- wishmaster
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There was a meeting of all the Surd freedom fighters.They were planning for a free Punjab. Santa Singh raised a point,"Oh...we'll take Punjab from India but how would we develop it?"That was a tough one indeed. Banta Singh had a brainwave..."No problem! We'll attack America, it would take over us and thenwe would become a State of USA and develop automatically."All the surds became happy with this very simple solution but an old surdwas not. Someone asked him why he wasn't happy.The old surd replied, "THAT'S ALL VERY WELL...WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF BY CHANCEWE TOOK OVER AMERICA???"
- wishmaster
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An Englishman, an American and a Sardarji are called upon to test
a lie detector. The Englishman says: "I think I can empty 20 bottles of
beer". BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector. "Ok", he says, "10 bottles".
And the machine is silent. The American says: "I think I can eat 15
hamburgers". BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector. "Allright, 8 hamburgers". And
the machine's silent. The Sardarji says: "I think...", BUZZZZZZ goes
the machine.
a lie detector. The Englishman says: "I think I can empty 20 bottles of
beer". BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector. "Ok", he says, "10 bottles".
And the machine is silent. The American says: "I think I can eat 15
hamburgers". BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector. "Allright, 8 hamburgers". And
the machine's silent. The Sardarji says: "I think...", BUZZZZZZ goes
the machine.
- wishmaster
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Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *again* barefoot!"
- wishmaster
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Sardarji is in Delhi. He is walking on a street which has Clock Tower when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower. Sardarji says "Yes". "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The man took the thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Sardarji figured he was taken for a ride. On the next day the Sardarji is again walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the clock. "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The Sardarji gives him the thousand and says "I am not a fool.This time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder."
- wishmaster
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There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some
money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the
playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've
kidnapped you." The Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped
your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag & put it beneath
the mango tree next to the slide on the north side of the city play
ground".Signed, "A Sardarji".
The Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to
show it to his parents.
The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was
sitting beneath the mango tree. The Sardarji opened up the bag and found
the $10,000 with a note saying, "How could you do this to a fellow
Sardarji?!"
money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the
playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've
kidnapped you." The Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped
your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag & put it beneath
the mango tree next to the slide on the north side of the city play
ground".Signed, "A Sardarji".
The Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to
show it to his parents.
The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was
sitting beneath the mango tree. The Sardarji opened up the bag and found
the $10,000 with a note saying, "How could you do this to a fellow
Sardarji?!"
- wishmaster
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Two Sardars went into a pub and after ordering two
beers took some sandwiches out of their pockets and started to eat them.
"You can't eat your own sandwiches in here," complained the pub-owner.
So the two sardars swapped (exchanged) their sandwiches.
beers took some sandwiches out of their pockets and started to eat them.
"You can't eat your own sandwiches in here," complained the pub-owner.
So the two sardars swapped (exchanged) their sandwiches.
- wishmaster
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Sardarjee to Sunita: "I want to marry you"
Sunita: "But I am one year elder to you."
Sardarjee: "No Problem, then I will marry you next year."
Sunita: "But I am one year elder to you."
Sardarjee: "No Problem, then I will marry you next year."
- wishmaster
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Two sardarjis were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying
like anything. So the other asked,"Why are you crying?" The first one
replied, "I came here for blood test". Second one asked,"So? Are you
afraid?" First one replied,"No, not that. During the blood test they
cut my finger" Hearing this the second one started crying. The first one
was astonished and asked other, "Why are you crying?" The other replied,
"I have come for my urine test."
- wishmaster
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Once a sardar called his girlfriend and said "Darling,
come home, no one's at my house." When his girlfriend reaches his
house,she finds it locked. [/b]
come home, no one's at my house." When his girlfriend reaches his
house,she finds it locked. [/b]
- wishmaster
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Santa was walking through Rose Garden in Chandigarh and was astonished to see an old man, fishing rod in hand, fishing over a beautiful bed of red roses.
"Tsk Tsk!" said Santa to himself. "What a sad sight. That poor old man is fishing over a bed of flowers. I'll see if I can help."
So he walked up to the old man and asked, "What are you doing, my friend?"
"Fishing, sir."
"Fishing, well how would you like to come have a drink with me?"
The old man stood put his rod away and followed the kind stranger to the corner bar. He ordered a large glass of Scotch, snacks and a fine cigar.
Santa felt good about helping the old man, and he asked, "Tell me, old friend, how many did you catch today?"
The old fellow took a long drag on the cigar, blew a careful smoke ring and replied, "You are the fourth today, sir!"
"Tsk Tsk!" said Santa to himself. "What a sad sight. That poor old man is fishing over a bed of flowers. I'll see if I can help."
So he walked up to the old man and asked, "What are you doing, my friend?"
"Fishing, sir."
"Fishing, well how would you like to come have a drink with me?"
The old man stood put his rod away and followed the kind stranger to the corner bar. He ordered a large glass of Scotch, snacks and a fine cigar.
Santa felt good about helping the old man, and he asked, "Tell me, old friend, how many did you catch today?"
The old fellow took a long drag on the cigar, blew a careful smoke ring and replied, "You are the fourth today, sir!"
- wishmaster
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Once a Singh was traveling in a train.
He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train Rs 20 to
wake him up when the
station arrived.
This guy was a barber, and he felt that for Rs 20, the Sardarji deserved
more service.
So, when the Singh fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard.
When the station arrived, the Singh was woken up, and he went home.
Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw
himself in the mirror.
Said his wife "
What's the matter?"
He replied
"The cheat on the train has taken my Rs 20 and woken up someone else".
He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train Rs 20 to
wake him up when the
station arrived.
This guy was a barber, and he felt that for Rs 20, the Sardarji deserved
more service.
So, when the Singh fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard.
When the station arrived, the Singh was woken up, and he went home.
Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw
himself in the mirror.
Said his wife "
What's the matter?"
He replied
"The cheat on the train has taken my Rs 20 and woken up someone else".
- wishmaster
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- Eros
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