Dubai Forums Dubai Discussions Dubai Romance

Princess Banana Hammock wrote:Well, I'm a single girl in Dubai and I can honestly say that money just does not do it for me. The champagne and flash cars... well, it doesn't even scratch the surface. Some girls like it, and there's plenty of it here in Dubai...

I think the term 'easy' can be extremely unfair. At the end of the day, it's generally a preconception. If a guy sleeps with a girl on the first date, why do you automatically think she does that on every date? Maybe she just genuinely likes you and thinks it will lead somewhere. She may be a bit of a sl*t but then again she may be a genuine and a nice girl. Is it not worth finding out before you cast her off?

Personally, I've never got my head round a guys mentality. Perhaps they are worried that the girl who sleeps with them on the first date is a bit of a slapper and therefore the guy won't continue seeing her because they are worried that their egos will be dented when she doesn't answer your calls... My advice, don't assume.

S.e.x is, generally speaking, a much more emotional experience for a girl. I have had a conversation with a couple of guys this week about how they think girls are easy. These guys are sleeping with a girl (no the same one). They tell her they don't want a relationship. The girl accepts it. Then after, they sleep with her again. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!!?!? You can't tell a girl you're not interested in taking things further and then sleep with her again!!! Even if she's asking you to!! Have some self control man!! Most girls will be thinkig that they are the ones to change you. They think you'll soon realise what a wonderful person she is and you'll want to date her. They'll think 'well he slept with me, so it must mean something'.

Men should think about their actions. They should stop being so selfish. If a girl is, as you put it, 'easy', then why would you take advantage of that? It's almost an emotional state... probably the result of being treated like crap in a previous relationship. Aside from the hookers, I'd say most girls are, even if they won't admit it, desperately hanging onto that bit of hope that the guy will genuinely like them and want to date them and pursue a relationship.

End of rant!

i like the way she thinks , id be suprised if you were an arab

if it happens , its happens ... great ,, if it happens on the first date ,, awesome!!!

if the chick is a fairy ,shes a fairy!! , at least she is having fun and enjoying life.. if the man is a fairy ,, well he is engoying life too

what about the image? well f..k it ,, i dont give a flyin fcuk if everyone thinks im a fairy ,, its a lifestyle .. you are adults you can decide for yourself

and for those close minded people that like to put others down by calling them sluts , go play with yourself while watching telly tubbies or something

Mint Tulip wrote:To blame men for the perception of some women does not answer why the perception exists. I think that we have to admit that there are plenty of slutty women in Dubai and it tarnishes the image of the city and of soceity to some point - and some people just wonder - what's up with that? (That was the question of this post in the first place). There are plenty of slutty men too, of course, it goes both ways, but in the end sluttiness is not a virture, it's counterproductive - just because it exists does not make it OK.

I think that women are more cunning than what is believed by many including women themselves... Woman know what they're getting into and what they want when they meet a certain type of guy. A woman that expects an "instant" relationship for whatever reason, and then complains when/if she's judged by her behavior, should look into herself and the reasons behind her actions.

We don't want to be perceived as less intelligent and less capable than men but at the same time many women use the argument that they're men's unwitting victims when it comes to relationships; That they just followed their heart and did not use their intellect, they act out of their ever fragile feelings. Nope, that argument doesn't hold anymore.

wow you guys thanks for the excellent contributions thats more like it.

Princess your post is a great honest prespective that is refreshing to read on this thread.

Princess Banana Hammock wrote:
These guys are sleeping with a girl (no the same one). They tell her they don't want a relationship. The girl accepts it. Then after, they sleep with her again. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!!?!? You can't tell a girl you're not interested in taking things further and then sleep with her again!!! Even if she's asking you to!! Have some self control man!!

What about the girl ? didnt she also know he said he didnt want to have a relationship ? isnt she implying that she is okay with fcuk buddy status when she accepts to sleep with him again ?

Most girls will be thinkig that they are the ones to change you. They think you'll soon realise what a wonderful person she is and you'll want to date her. They'll think 'well he slept with me, so it must mean something

yes and they are wrong most of the time

Men should think about their actions. They should stop being so selfish. If a girl is, as you put it, 'easy', then why would you take advantage of that? It's almost an emotional state... probably the result of being treated like crap in a previous relationship.

Being a male i can tell you what you asking for is nearly impossible. A single man will in most cases take advantage of this situation.

Princess Banana Hammock wrote:a girl is, as you put it, 'easy', then why would you take advantage of that? It's almost an emotional state... probably the result of being treated like crap in a previous relationship.
End of rant!

I agree that men should not take advantage and yet they do .... think about it this way .... if I am not going to take care of myself (by not allowing anyone to take advantage of me) then why the heck should someone else take care of me?? I don't imagine someone else is going to "save" me. I'd rather be the one to do so myself.

Bleakus wrote:

Sara1983 wrote:

Bleakus wrote:^^ the dream continues

hmmm, grabs some of those dreamy bubbles & writes "Yo Dream End."

why dont you get your dagger and stab my heart!!

aww I'm not that mean

Again, both are to blame.

If a man knowingly tells a woman what she wants to hear to try to get her into bed - should he really be calling her "easy"? I'd call him manipulative.

If a woman gives herself to a man thinking it will make him stick around - isn't she just deluding herself? Why blame the man for not sticking around after or using her? She let herself be used.

Neither has the right to think that men and women are dishonest and slutty based on those kinds of experiences. Each one was being a fool.

If people want a relationship they should actually get to know each other and don't go to bed to quickly and don't buy each other expensive presents or flash one's wealth or status around. If you use your head as well as your heart you can more easily weed out the people who are not good for you and save yourself some heartache and hassle.

Nismo: I'm half Arab, half British.

Mint Tulip: With regards to your 'That they just followed their heart and did not use their intellect, they act out of their ever fragile feelings. Nope, that argument doesn't hold anymore.' Well it does happen. I've been caught in this trap a couple of times. It doesn't mean I'm not using my intellect. I'm just overwhelmed by emotion and the moment I'm in. However, I don't feel it is enough to call me 'easy' as I have never been with a guy that I genuinely did/do not like and didn't want to pursue a relationship with. I'm not saying you instantly fall in love but you may connect and see yourself falling in love in the future. Guys have told me they generally know whether or not they click with a girl in the first few minutes. I'm pretty sure, generally speaking, it's the same for women too.

And yes, I've been hurt and I have looked at my actions and wondered if they were wrong, irrational or unjustified, and I strongly believe that they weren't. I don't see myself as being 'easy' (I don't walk into bars and clubs and pick up guys) and I don't have an ulterior motive to my actions I'm not after money or arm candy) so I am not quite sure what you are referring to there...

Women in Dubai should not be tarred with the same brush. Every girl is an individual and will have different feelings and emotions to the next girl. I just do not understand what gives another person, the right to judge whether a woman is slutty? Unless you know her pretty well and know her emotional state and what she wants from guys, you can not judge her.

Pretty Penny: I do agree with you but I also feel that on the other hand, what about the vulnerable women? Those who have faith in men and that one of them will sweep her off her feet? You can't always protect yourself 100%.

Maaad: As for your question about a woman agreeing to be a F Buddy. Yeah, it's true on the outside she has agreed to it. But I guarantee on the inside she will be wanting a whole lot more. But again, it's almost a state, wanting to hold on to the little bit of what you have in the hope he'll soon realise...

What I'm trying to get across is, don't prejudge a woman. Don't assume that she is 'easy' until you know the story. Thee are many complicated and complex reasons as to why a girl makes the decision she does. I know because I make them. But I have never ever thought they were the wrong decision.

Kanelli, you are a wise woman!

Like i said before..... the satement 'Girls are easy' depends on what kinda girl u are looking for.. it would be never easy if u are looking for a longtime relationship.
But on the other hand if its only for the s3xual pleasure,
'Girls are easy' - coz the basic nature of men is to consider themselves above women. Thats the only reason y someone can say that.

and for those who said men taking advantage of women, I think that statement doesnt make anysense, Or i should say i've seen women taking advantage of men as well. What i mean to say is, taking advantage of a situation depends on who's stronger in that relationship. When we are in a relationship, what ever kind... there'sll always b the one who leads it and the leader may differ according to the situation but its not taking advantage, its just the nature of any relationship.

Men and women have never seemed to fully understand each other. We may never b able to understand women completely n women would never understand us, but still men and women lead wonderful lives together...thats the magic of it.

With due respect to the bold women here, lets not make this a feminist issue...lets admit that men and women are made different... and i dont mean to say that men are superior or something, just that women and men are not comparable, they both are meant to be different.

I would say women are stronger and much more powerful than men.they can control and manipulate things so easily than a man. They can make people think and believe the way they want..

but the one thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives men the power. We just take it.

princess banana

I hope that you don't think that I'm calling you a certain name, that is not the case at all! My comments, which I stand by, were meant to reflect the general situation in Dubai on this subject - and the way I personally see things.

I agree with Lucifer - I do not like the argument that women are victims of men when it comes to (normal) relationships. And I think that if certain women are labeled as promiscous it's because they are and because they themselves choose to be, not because of circumstances beyond their control, or because they fall into some guy's trap, but because of their own decisions. Stereotyping all woman as easy is the unfortunate consequence of the actions of some...

Also... Everyone makes mistakes. Admitting to mistakes is a virture. Afterall, one is supposed to learn from one's mistakes.

B-lady what u said doesnt make any sense , the $exual drive is there but it doesnt control people , and i dont think the hot weather has anything 2 do with it

Not at all mint, no worries. It's just something I feel strongly about as I have been messesd around so many times. I'm lead to believe one thing and receive another. Maybe it's the guys I've dated... but I've never ever looked for or desired a casual or short term fling, yet that is all I have ever had. That's not a concious decision from me.

I'm not one of these ditzy girls that fall for anything, in fact I like to think I have my head screwed on (most of the time), and when I feel the time is right and I sense the guy is serious from signals they send me I might act on these. However, I have recently found that guys are not always so sincere and that they will say anything to you to get what they want.

This is where I agree with Kanelli's statement: "If a man knowingly tells a woman what she wants to hear to try to get her into bed - should he really be calling her "easy"? I'd call him manipulative."

And she's right. If I had succumed to it, I would feel used and manipulated.

It's not fair to label a girl 'easy' when you don't know the story behind it all. I'm sure a lot of the time you'll find the story is sorrow. Personally, I would determine an 'easy' girl as one who went out looking for s.e.x on a casual basis. But how many girls are actually like that?

Princess Banana Hammock wrote:. Personally, I would determine an 'easy' girl as one who went out looking for s.e.x on a casual basis. But how many girls are actually like that?

Plenty

We live in different times.... But i would call that Normall, not easy.

It is always about perception and things people set for them self. You should not sleep with someone in the first date!! Does second date make it ok?? I do not get it. Why people have to put do and don’t stuff for everyone to follow. Princesses I agree with you totally, it all depend on the situation, how you feel about the person etc but then if the guy judge you been easy oh well, he is not the right man for you. It is very difficult for most men to hide their lust if they are only after s e x , so that can weed the bad apples easily but how about their perception? How you will know that, I guess that why people follow the rules.

Princess Banana Hammock wrote:Personally, I would determine an 'easy' girl as one who went out looking for s.e.x on a casual basis. But how many girls are actually like that?

Good question. I was always under the impression that women had to be emotionally involved to have s.e.x. But after talking to some of my own friends and a lot of guy friends I have realized that this isn't true. There are some women who are just looking for some casual s.e.x after a night out without any emotional attachment whatsoever.
So does that label them easy or just easy-going? Something to think about...

I don't follow rules. 1st date, 2nd date, 5th date, 10th date, 3 months, 6 months, one year, marriage... what difference does it make?? You could be best friends with someone, go on a date for the first time and sleep with them. You might never have met thwm before, get married after 1 month and then sleep with them. Does that make you easy??? I'm sorry... that's rubbish. I follow my heart. So sara, you know what I'm talking about. Yeah, I might get hurt along the way but I know when I find the right guy, I've really found the right guy...

I don't care what society saya. I'm a free spirited, well rounded, open person. If a guy wants to mess me around, then MORE FOOL HIM!!!!!!!

Princess Banana Hammock wrote:I don't follow rules. 1st date, 2nd date, 5th date, 10th date, 3 months, 6 months, one year, marriage... what difference does it make?? You could be best friends with someone, go on a date for the first time and sleep with them. You might never have met thwm before, get married after 1 month and then sleep with them. Does that make you easy??? I'm sorry... that's rubbish. I follow my heart. So sara, you know what I'm talking about. Yeah, I might get hurt along the way but I know when I find the right guy, I've really found the right guy...

I don't care what society saya. I'm a free spirited, well rounded, open person. If a guy wants to mess me around, then MORE FOOL HIM!!!!!!!

u go girl!

noni wrote:There are some women who are just looking for some casual s.e.x after a night out without any emotional attachment whatsoever.
So does that label them easy or just easy-going? Something to think about...

I 've mentioned this before, it makes them normal people.

i think women have been unfairly labelled these names over the years and its time they were let go. Each individual should make their own decisions and people should just respect that.

Whether she sleeps with one or one hundred, her life she makes her choices. Same with the guys.

Princess Banana Hammock wrote:I don't follow rules. 1st date, 2nd date, 5th date, 10th date, 3 months, 6 months, one year, marriage... what difference does it make?? You could be best friends with someone, go on a date for the first time and sleep with them. You might never have met thwm before, get married after 1 month and then sleep with them. Does that make you easy??? I'm sorry... that's rubbish. I follow my heart. So sara, you know what I'm talking about. Yeah, I might get hurt along the way but I know when I find the right guy, I've really found the right guy...

I don't care what society saya. I'm a free spirited, well rounded, open person. If a guy wants to mess me around, then MORE FOOL HIM!!!!!!!

Well exactly, I make my own rules too, I got married after one month meeting my ex, people told me to wait etc, at that time, he was my soul mate, we matched perfectly and time was not going to let me know him any better. We are not together but do I regret my decision? No, things did not work out at the end but I did spend very good time with him for 4 years. I still make decisions and do not listen to rules, I never played hard to get or do not call him first games that girls play. If I feel is right you go for it, no one can set up general rule for everyone.

Why thank you Noni!

Sara, I totally agree. You can't predict what life will bring. All you can do is follow your heart. That's not to say I don't have regrets. I'd be lying if I said that. But I think by playing games, you attract just that, players. Ok, so my luck hasn't been great so far... (coming up to 23 and never had a bf) but when I find it, my oh my I truly believe I'll find it. Optimism is a beautiful thing. I'd rather say I tried it and it didn't work than 'what if'.

Society can be a cruel world. I ask for others' advice but that doesn't mean I always follow it, althouh I always take it on board. I do what I think is right, if it doesn't work, so be it. Label me whatever you want, I guarantee most girls are not as much of a warm hearted person that I am. Not that I'm blowing my own trumpet, but I know I'm a good person and the way I see it, is this is just a test to find the person I am truly compatibale with. Whether I know him already or not... Love is just around the corner...

With that positive attitude....you will find exactly what you are looking for!

rvp_legend wrote:

noni wrote:There are some women who are just looking for some casual s.e.x after a night out without any emotional attachment whatsoever.
So does that label them easy or just easy-going? Something to think about...

I 've mentioned this before, it makes them normal people.

i think women have been unfairly labelled these names over the years and its time they were let go. Each individual should make their own decisions and people should just respect that.

Whether she sleeps with one or one hundred, her life she makes her choices. Same with the guys.

The thing is that to you and to others this is normal, to many it is not. Even psychologists agree that promiscous people have deeper issues. Some people will justify their behavior or call it normal instead of digging deeper into why they act on their impulses to such a degree. just saying...

Mint Tulip wrote:
The thing is that to you and to others this is normal, to many it is not. Even psychologists agree that promiscous people have deeper issues. Some people will justify their behavior or call it normal instead of digging deeper into why they act on their impulses to such a degree. just saying...

Do the promiscuous issues apply to both genders?

Mint Tulip wrote:

rvp_legend wrote:

noni wrote:There are some women who are just looking for some casual s.e.x after a night out without any emotional attachment whatsoever.
So does that label them easy or just easy-going? Something to think about...

I 've mentioned this before, it makes them normal people.

i think women have been unfairly labelled these names over the years and its time they were let go. Each individual should make their own decisions and people should just respect that.

Whether she sleeps with one or one hundred, her life she makes her choices. Same with the guys.

The thing is that to you and to others this is normal, to many it is not. Even psychologists agree that promiscous people have deeper issues. Some people will justify their behavior or call it normal instead of digging deeper into why they act on their impulses to such a degree. just saying...

Mint, that's a sweeping statement. Do promiscous people have issues? If so, like Noni said, does it apply to both genders? Because boy, there are a lot of guys I know with issues!!! As long as you're not hurting other people, why do you even have to justify your behaviour? Who do you have to justify it to? Society? I'll use me as an example... Those who know me on here will verify... what you see is exactly what you get. There are no deeper issues. So yes, to me, it's normal. And to what degree are you talking about? Again, it's about prejudging people. I'm sure there are just as many virgins with these 'deeper issues' that you speak of as ther are promiscous people. Each to their own. People should not judge others on the number people they have slept with. As long as you're safe, then it shouldn't be a problem.

noni wrote:

Mint Tulip wrote:
The thing is that to you and to others this is normal, to many it is not. Even psychologists agree that promiscous people have deeper issues. Some people will justify their behavior or call it normal instead of digging deeper into why they act on their impulses to such a degree. just saying...

Do the promiscuous issues apply to both genders?

Yes of course!

But the genders can be promiscous for different reasons. I remember we had this type of discussions in my psychology class and among the things that were discussed: a promiscous man might have unresolved s.e.x.ual identity issues, or he might be searching for an ideal that he never quite seems to find (control, boundary, place in soceity and self-esteem issues...). While a woman might be using her s.e.x.uality to satisfy needs other than physical ones - she might be afraid of being alone or she might have a strong need to be desired and a strong need for affection/love - and she won't mind settling for temporary and unsubstantial affection.

banana
I'm saying that stating promiscuity should be the norm or is "normal" is the sweeping statement.

well i have kept quite most of the time but nowI wanna state something...yes the term easy is mostly applied to women cos traditinally even now a man go after women. It also depends what u call it easy - sleeping on first date? exchanging numbers with complete acquaintaince etc. So basically women who are known as easy are called sl*ts, prostitutes so what term is there to describe men?

Dubai may be easy bcos dating culture may be not very developed yet and many ppl face restrictions which makes one think this chance is th elast chance so let me go ahead with this guy/girl.

P.S If u dont mind me asking I have Muslim freind who told me dating is not allowed in the religion is it true?

yes that is true.

If a girl really is just looking for casual s.e.x, then good for her. She's probably got the best idea. After all, we now live in a time when as women, we no longer need a man to hunt/provide for us. We are more than capable of earning our own money, fixing our cars, doing our own DIY. In most cases, we probably do a better job.

I think the term 'easy' was thought up by a guy because he had been messed around by a girl and he then felt inferior, so by calling her 'easy' it made him look slightly more manly in front of his friends after that ego of his was crushed. Now it's just an excuse for any man to put down woman who are strong minded and open and who do not need a man in their life to look after them.

Sniper,
A male fairy can be called: manwhore, hustler, skanko..

I think that causal “relationships” are detrimental for several reasons. One being that it cheapens the concept of relationships in general. When relationships are seen as disposable then so are people. Another thing is the ick factor. Prostitutes practice risky behavior (protection or not) hence they’re not considered the healthiest of people. So are promiscous people – they’re more disease-prone, ickier.


Princess banana,
Women can be strong-minded and independent without necessarily being promiscous. Let’s call a spade a spade: promiscuity is promiscuity: "easy" " fairy" are just other words for it. Many women are promiscous because they’re needy, which is not necessarily associated with a strong-minded woman, imho. Also why do you insist on blaming men for this particular label? Why the victimization thing? If "strong-minded" women want to follow a particular behavior, then they should be strong-minded enough to take the heat on their behavior. One can’t eat that slice of cake and have it too...

Mint Tulip wrote:Sniper,
Prostitutes practice risky behavior (protection or not) hence they’re not considered the healthiest of people. So are promiscous people – they’re more disease-prone, ickier.

I read that prostitutes have lower STD rates in comparison to the local population. Most prostitutes that are HIV positive are infected from intravanous drug use.