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I date with my boy-friend for 2 years. We have a little bit strange relationship because most of the times we are not together. He lives in one country but travels all around the world. I now moved to Emirates and plan to stay here for several years, he does not want to come to live here. I am planning to come to visit him in 2 weeks and have no idea when we will meet the next time. The last time when we saw each other it was in May.
I have no doubts that he is loyal to me. And I know that he loves me a lot and he even wants to marry me. But I do not know if I love him. When we are apart I doubt, when we are together I feel myself the happiest person in the world but still doubt if I love him. He is an amazing person and I know that he will be a perfect husband and father.
I get scared imagining the fact that one day he will not be with me. But at the same time I am asking myself if I am doing the right thing keeping us together. I do not want to hurt him in any way. For me his happiness is more improtant then my own.
Maybe anyone was in the similar situation and can advise me something.

Hi Skylink

I read your issue.What i can see from here is you are very good at heart thats why you dont wanna hurt him,thats your love for him.But let me tell you , you are lonely even though you might have many friends.The thing is you are committed to him but may be bacause of his travelling its getting difficult on your part

Very simple speak with him tell him the truth what you think and see you will feel soo relaxed.Love life is very simple if we dont want to make it complicated.Trust me its really simple just speak to him and expect the best results.Isnt it better to leave with heart with no doubts and relaxed insteads of having doubts and confussion.May be even he wants to tell you something.And one more thing if you are not telling him just because you dont wanna hurt me,than dear you are hurting him double as well as giving hi false hope.

Hope you have a bright future and you problem gets solved.cheers

follow your head and not your heart

soooooooooo its time to move on

arnie if your reply was

Cheers,

AG

she would have left him for you instantly !!!

If you having doubts now do not bother, move on. You might regret it later and might not be happy with him. If you having doubt with someone that you hardly see, imagine living with him 24/7 . It easy said than done but think very carefully.

guys who travel more will never be "true" . i dont travel much ,come to me . haha

tiger wrote:Hi Skylink

I read your issue.What i can see from here is you are very good at heart thats why you dont wanna hurt him,thats your love for him.But let me tell you , you are lonely even though you might have many friends.The thing is you are committed to him but may be bacause of his travelling its getting difficult on your part

Very simple speak with him tell him the truth what you think and see you will feel soo relaxed.Love life is very simple if we dont want to make it complicated.Trust me its really simple just speak to him and expect the best results.Isnt it better to leave with heart with no doubts and relaxed insteads of having doubts and confussion.May be even he wants to tell you something.And one more thing if you are not telling him just because you dont wanna hurt me,than dear you are hurting him double as well as giving hi false hope.

Hope you have a bright future and you problem gets solved.cheers

No matter how much I want to talk, I will never be able to start the conversation. And what shall I tell him if I am not sure what I feel? I am simply afraid to loose him and in the future realize that he was the only one. If he starts the conversation I might say something, but if he does not, I will not as well.

arniegang wrote:follow your head and not your heart

soooooooooo its time to move on

I think that I am following my head now.

If you are never together, how can you have a relationship? Also, when you are seeing someone infrequently it is much easier to have more romance and put on your good faces with each other. Seeing someone day to day you truly get to know their personality and what it might mean to live with them one day. My advice is to move on and find someone you can actually have a full-time relationship with.

sara_uk wrote:If you having doubts now do not bother, move on. You might regret it later and might not be happy with him. If you having doubt with someone that you hardly see, imagine living with him 24/7 . It easy said than done but think very carefully.

I can't leave him with a broken heart!!!
If he leaves me, I will not blame myself for hurting him.

alex_fun wrote:guys who travel more will never be "true" . i dont travel much ,come to me . haha

If you are not "true", it does not mean that the rest are the same.
I know that he is loyal to me! As well as I am to him.

So you are going to stay with someone who isn't making you 100% happy because you might hurt his feelings? What about your feelings and your happiness - are you worth nothing?

kanelli wrote:If you are never together, how can you have a relationship? Also, when you are seeing someone infrequently it is much easier to have more romance and put on your good faces with each other. Seeing someone day to day you truly get to know their personality and what it might mean to live with them one day. My advice is to move on and find someone you can actually have a full-time relationship with.

Easy to say, but hard to do!
There are many couples who do not see each other often but they are happy anyway.

Long distance relationships dont work dudette

as per my experience

Bleakus wrote:Long distance relationships dont work dudette

as per my experience

But with some people it works!!!!
I just want to learn how to maintain the relationship on a distance. I really do not want to loose this person!

kanelli wrote:So you are going to stay with someone who isn't making you 100% happy because you might hurt his feelings? What about your feelings and your happiness - are you worth nothing?

I am this kind of person how is living for others. I do not possess any sense of selfishnesss. I wish I did.
Also, I am always surrounded by guys. But I have not met anyone who is at least half as good as my boy-friend.

Skylink best solution:

Take a decision,and live happily.Either take a decision or let the things be as it is.

skylink wrote:

Bleakus wrote:Long distance relationships dont work dudette

as per my experience

But with some people it works!!!!
I just want to learn how to maintain the relationship on a distance. I really do not want to loose this person!

i didnt mean to put you down

but its really hard to maintain a relationship over a long distance, i personally dont know how, maybe somebody can help you here instead of me

some people can pull it off though, i just dont know how

skylink wrote:

Bleakus wrote:Long distance relationships dont work dudette

as per my experience

But with some people it works!!!!
I just want to learn how to maintain the relationship on a distance. I really do not want to loose this person!

So you found the solution by yourself...

hmmmm long distance relationship. for some (very few) it works, for most - LDR doesn't work cos it takes a great effort to maintain it and of course there is big temptation on both parties, methinks.

weary_heart wrote:hmmmm long distance relationship. for some (very few) it works, for most - LDR doesn't work cos it takes a great effort to maintain it and of course there is big temptation on both parties, methinks.

me agrees , i never believed in long distance relationship , if i cant see , hold talk to the person i am dating then how can i relate and connect to him or even fall in love with ?

people these days are becoming more and more spoilt .. do you know that most of the laborers here in the UAE have a wife and kids back home and just send them money and then get to see them once every two years. I never hear them complain about not being able to workout a long distance relationship !

If you are positive he is loyal to you ..and you love him, you should be able to wait for the time you are together. A relationship that is strong and worth it should work when you are together and millions of miles away. As long as both of you are loyal, a long distance relationship can go from seeming impossible to completely doable, it is the other nonsense/unncessary things that get in the way.

MaaaD wrote:people these days are becoming more and more spoilt .. do you know that most of the laborers here in the UAE have a wife and kids back home and just send them money and then get to see them once every two years. I never hear them complain about not being able to workout a long distance relationship !

this different , if i am married and my husband needs to travel abroad to support me and our family ,ofcourse i will put effort and make it work , but i dont want a boyfriend that i can see once every 3 month

i know that im not worth to say this as i ask also for advise before..but what i can say is find yourself first and you will get it..

noni wrote:If you are positive he is loyal to you ..and you love him, you should be able to wait for the time you are together. A relationship that is strong and worth it should work when you are together and millions of miles away. As long as both of you are loyal, a long distance relationship can go from seeming impossible to completely doable, it is the other nonsense/unncessary things that get in the way.

Yes, I am absolutely sure that he is 100% loyal to me. No doubts about it and I know that he loves me a lot.
But we really see each other very rarely. The last time when we saw each other it was in May, we also spent 2 weeks together in March and before we have not seen each other for 9 months.
We are going to meet in a couple of weeks and spend 2-3 weeks together and then I have no idea when we are going to see each other again.....

skylink wrote:

noni wrote:If you are positive he is loyal to you ..and you love him, you should be able to wait for the time you are together. A relationship that is strong and worth it should work when you are together and millions of miles away. As long as both of you are loyal, a long distance relationship can go from seeming impossible to completely doable, it is the other nonsense/unncessary things that get in the way.

Yes, I am absolutely sure that he is 100% loyal to me. No doubts about it and I know that he loves me a lot.
But we really see each other very rarely. The last time when we saw each other it was in May, we also spent 2 weeks together in March and before we have not seen each other for 9 months.
We are going to meet in a couple of weeks and spend 2-3 weeks together and then I have no idea when we are going to see each other again.....

i dont know i think its too much pressure on a relationship , i hate waiting and not knowing when i am going to see him again

skylink wrote:
Yes, I am absolutely sure that he is 100% loyal to me. No doubts about it and I know that he loves me a lot.
But we really see each other very rarely. The last time when we saw each other it was in May, we also spent 2 weeks together in March and before we have not seen each other for 9 months.
We are going to meet in a couple of weeks and spend 2-3 weeks together and then I have no idea when we are going to see each other again.....

Well then its up to you...if you were really that much in love with him and wanting to be with him I guess you could find a way to make it work. Feel lucky that you have a man that is 100% loyal to you...in my opinion I think that is something worthwhile with all those scumbags out there. But you should just trust your instincts...if you can't wait for him for a couple of months how do you expect waiting for him if (god forbid) something worse happenend? think about it ...

skylink wrote:I date with my boy-friend for 2 years. We have a little bit strange relationship because most of the times we are not together. He lives in one country but travels all around the world. I now moved to Emirates and plan to stay here for several years, he does not want to come to live here. I am planning to come to visit him in 2 weeks and .

there is only one solution to this







put a gun on ur head and press the trigger and it will all be over soon.......

Planning reunions play a big part in keeping your relationship exciting, plus serve you the satisfaction of being able to see and touch each other occasionally. It gives you the opportunity to catch up on each other's life in person and to be able to share physical and intimate activities together, which will fulfill both of your needs and desires. Not re-uniting every once in a while will only damage the relationship you have, so if one of you are not willing to visit the other occasionally, then you may need to question the interest and care your partner has for you and should probably end the relationship and move on. If you and your partner truly want this to work out, then you will both continue to be eager to see each other as often as you can and every time to have the chance to.

Setting a limit of how long you will be apart is a wise thing to do if you do not want to end up waiting forever. There will be a day when you and your partner will have to start planning a serious future, which can only happen when you are living in the same area or perhaps even living together, whichever makes you most comfortable. If none of you are willing to agree on a place to settle and start having a relationship where you see each other on a regular basis, then you can pretty much forget about accomplishing anything out of your long distance relationship. If your partner truly loves you and wants to be with you, then they would not want to wait forever to be with you.

With the right amount of effort and interest on both parts, a long distance relationship can survive the obstacles it will frequently be challenged with. As long as you both refresh your memories of why you chose to do this in the first place, trust each other, inform one another of your personal lives, keep in touch, and visit, your relationship can turn out to be one of the most successful and happy relationships that ever existed. You both will be secure, happy and satisfied until the day comes when you will re-unite for good and build your wonderful future together.

from: http://www.enotalone.com/article/2247.html