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There is a boy, smart, handsome and kind, yes girls that's exists!
BUT I don't know really it's very hard to understand my story. I think he loves me but he is afraid of marriage. He told me he is lost and I told him it's finished. He did not call me for 2 weeks. Do you think he has another girl in his life?
Many reasons that are ridiculous for me are:
* he is lebanese and I'm french (from an arabic country)
* he is very attached to his country
* religion: his family is very practitioner (do you know the 2 branches in islam). Sorry because I'm very tolerant and I don't like making divisions between people.

I know this relation is very complicated and the distance between us does not improve all

BUT I'm fond of this man and I can not love nor marry another man I'm sure of this. So I think I will stay alone with my love for him.
There is a friend who told me: "love is better than be loved"
I was ready to make sacrifices for him maybe I did not show him but now I think it's unusefull.
Please could you tell me your views? your advices are welcome.

PS: sorry for my horrible english

There could be many reasons why his behaving the way he is towards you....call him ask him why his ignoring you! Fair enough his affraid of commitment but it doesnt mean he should blank you all together! make sure he gives you reasons why his being like that?

If he doesnt tell you why, then you will have to move on his not the one for you! and just think you deserve better then that! Because if he truely loves you he wouldnt do this, right????? I know its hard to just give up and move on but sometimes you have to do things for yourself to make you happy....when being in a relationship theres got to be talking involved, he needs to be more open to you about whats going through his head or else the relationship will break! Sorri if i sound harsh but its the truth! Hope everything works out well for you!

Hey zaynab;
first of all, welcome to the heartache club
I do not understand, why wouldnt he marry you? and why didnt he bother to call you? I understand that you love him, but does he love you aswell? They say "Do not marry the one that you love, but the one who loves you"
You mentioned that the distance between you and him is increasing. I say, if you really love him, and dont want to let go, try to work on this area the best. Do as much as you can to know whats going on in his mind. And when you do, try to work it out. If he is not ready to marry ýet' then can you wait?
Will his and your family accept this relationship? are you ready to go against your family if they dont? If youre making sacrifices make sure youre doing it for the right person my friend.
I tried answering you, because once upon a time i was in the same scenerio. But the info you provided was too little;

Good luck

A male perspecitve:

A man may get a little intimidated about marriage but if he is refusing to see you since you poped the question..... just kick arse and beat him up. He is immature or just looking at having a good time with you.

zaynab wrote:There is a boy, smart, handsome and kind, yes girls that's exists!
BUT I don't know really it's very hard to understand my story. I think he loves me but he is afraid of marriage. He told me he is lost and I told him it's finished. He did not call me for 2 weeks. Do you think he has another girl in his life?
Many reasons that are ridiculous for me are:
* he is lebanese and I'm french (from an arabic country)
* he is very attached to his country
* religion: his family is very practitioner (do you know the 2 branches in islam). Sorry because I'm very tolerant and I don't like making divisions between people.

I know this relation is very complicated and the distance between us does not improve all

BUT I'm fond of this man and I can not love nor marry another man I'm sure of this. So I think I will stay alone with my love for him.
There is a friend who told me: "love is better than be loved"
I was ready to make sacrifices for him maybe I did not show him but now I think it's unusefull.
Please could you tell me your views? your advices are welcome.

PS: sorry for my horrible english

Herez a super-1 formula which will always work! Meet him in public slap left and right cheekz as hard as u can and yell at the top of ur lungs "Y did u leave meeeeeeeee? U left ur baby on my bellyyyyyy!!!! And he will be forced to marry u..... and u both will live happily eva after.... simple as 1,2

I'm so sorry to reply just now but I'm very touched by all your answers and your advices, so many thanks all

Maybe I have to forget this man but it's too much hard for me to realise that this man is not for me. Be sure if I knew that he does'nt love me I would forget him and meet someone else. But till now I don't want to leave him and I can not imagine to be with another one. Do you understand me?

I have called him back because he was ill and I did not manage to tell him why does he act like that with me. I just tell him by e-mail why does he ignore me. And he replies to me saying that he was irritated because of my words.

In fact I'm not able to understand him, he is very complex. He is not sure of himself. He does not know in which country he will live till now because he has'nt any job in Lebanon for the moment. So I think this is the reason why he does not want to tell me anything about commitment. Besides he told me that he wanted to marry a lebanese girl at the begining because it was easier for him (and his family) but after a while he changed his opinion and he said that I was responsible for that. It was one of the reasons among which I have kept the hope to remain with him.

Thank you all...
Take care of yourself and the others

Did u try my formula yet?

sniper420 wrote:Did try my formula yet?

Baby in the belly? Lol
For some guys it is a more of a solid reason to ditch the girl!

From an ADULT males perspective.

Yes, perhaps he is inimidated and the Religion thing could be a major factor in that decision of him to not contact you and refuse your suggestions of marriage. If from a strict upbringing, his parents will no doubt want to have a say in who he marries! ( i could be wrong)

Time is a great healer and by saying you will never love or marry another man is ridiculous, i mean it. It is an immediate reaction.

You need to go out, let your friends support you and in time, you will meet another guy, but whatever you do, NEVER, EVER compare another man to him.

We are all different and have different qualities. Soome bad, some good, it will be up to you which quality you are looking for.

I was first fallen in love when I was 6 years old kid ,oh yeah baby as Austin power says;0) ,I was in deep love with my school teacher ,whenever she used to pull my cheeks I felt myself damn lucky.
It was inception and before reaching 14 ,I fallen in love with more than 50 girls and I never had courage to express my innocent feeling . well I was quite shy guy. But when i learnt how to express my feeling............

to be continued

advice to author of this post


Love doesn’t exist , if it exist,it never exist in middle east .Have you ever read any romantic book written by arab author ? they mostly write “ idiot’s guide to suicide bombing “ 101 ways to kill Jewish” Camel racing with kids “ etc etc ,so just leave that arab guy.

If you are enthusiastic, willing to accept new challenges , jst take my hand , I have proven track of being successful love making person .

what do you say major pain?

HP wrote:
If you are enthusiastic, willing to accept new challenges , jst take my hand , I have proven track of being successful love making person .

what do you say major pain?

Yeah that was with a donkey but this animal named zaynab is female homo sapiens

Yeah that was with a donkey but this animal named zaynab is female homo sapiens

i didnt make luv wid u , did i !! well she can try my luv if she doesnt like , money back gurantee

PS" where are liban and major pain now a days? "

Thank u Yorky you might be right but I don't understand these kind of parents who want to choose a girl for their son. He is 26 years old, he is not a kid!

Maybe I'm wrong but lately he said to me that I was too much french (is that a reason? ridiculous !!!!) I was very surprised by that because I love arabic ppl and arabic cultures, I'm very proud of my arabic roots.

Of course, I was born in France so I am used to live like french ppl and I'm not able to speak arabic but I have a lot of arabic friends cauz I feel very close to them.

Moreover I'm muslim so plz HP respect me (Dell is better quality no sorry I'm joking) so I have principles (I hope you understand what I mean).

I have told him I'd like to wear the Hijab and to become a real muslim woman you know but I think he doesn't believe me.
Little bracket: I can not now because it's not allowed in France to study nor work wearing the Hijab you know, that's why I'd like to go in Emirates, this my dream. So your ideas are welcome.

Regarding this man I'm starting to understand that I don't deserve him. I'm not saying I'm a angel but there are somethings you could do when you love someone that you can not understand but you do, you give (you only reason with your "elb" (heart)). And when you realise that the return is not really here I think you have understand that you could nothing to do more... give up is the best thing to do and that's what I have done. May God help me to hold on to my sufferings


Be happy in your life

Hey Zaynab,

I think thats a good decision. I don't think this guy deserves you. Well I am obviously passing judgements based on a few posts I have read on this thread. But the whole thing and his reaction sound sinister to me. Move on..... have a life.

Yeh sa4877 is right (what kinda nick is that anyway? )
I am so proud of your decision! really..
Life moves on and... you know there are many nice men out there! and am sure future holds the best for you
Good luck habibty!

Moreover I'm muslim so plz HP respect me (Dell is better quality no sorry I'm joking) so I have principles (I hope you understand what I mean).

islam doesn't allow to fall in pre-marriage relationship ,doesn't it? well i heard that French Govt has banned head scarf ,so i think we all should bane " French kiss" in Islamic countries

Few days ago ,I was interviewed at Dell ,it was informal interview , i wished to tell HR lady"damn u , HP is better than Dell" ( wink).

HP wrote:

Yeah that was with a donkey but this animal named zaynab is female homo sapiens

i didnt make luv wid u , did i !! well she can try my luv if she doesnt like , money back gurantee

PS" where are liban and major pain now a days? "

Yeah Yeah. Since when did monkeys have money? Ah those money collected in the zoo while "monkeying around" eh?

zaynab wrote:There is a boy, smart, handsome and kind, yes girls that's exists!
BUT I don't know really it's very hard to understand my story. I think he loves me but he is afraid of marriage. He told me he is lost and I told him it's finished. He did not call me for 2 weeks. Do you think he has another girl in his life?
Many reasons that are ridiculous for me are:
* he is lebanese and I'm french (from an arabic country)
* he is very attached to his country
* religion: his family is very practitioner (do you know the 2 branches in islam). Sorry because I'm very tolerant and I don't like making divisions between people.

I know this relation is very complicated and the distance between us does not improve all

BUT I'm fond of this man and I can not love nor marry another man I'm sure of this. So I think I will stay alone with my love for him.
There is a friend who told me: "love is better than be loved"
I was ready to make sacrifices for him maybe I did not show him but now I think it's unusefull.
Please could you tell me your views? your advices are welcome.

PS: sorry for my horrible english

Hey Zaynab, don't be so upset it is life and life has to move on. Life won't stop for you even if that man has gone from your life forever. My Girl Friend has left me I thougt I would die when love for her ends, but mostly strangely I live on. So please don't be so despaired, allow time to cure all your wounds.
BTW, I am single and handsome
Cheers.

yall come with crazy advice..girl zaynab...just go knock on his door and tell his parents that u r carrying his child(put a pillow under ur shirt) and i guarantee u that his u will marry him..if not..then pay a guy to date u and go the same places that ur ex goes to so u can rub it in his face..if none of this works..then take formula 1..

anyways..about wearing a scarf(hijab) for a guy to think that u have become a better person...DONT ..cuz u should only do it if u feel that it is right for YOU..otherwise i bet u will regret it and feel stupid that u have sacrafised so much for him..

and i bet u will sit in a year or so and laugh at this..cuz u will realize that u r better and u deserve more..so ditch the princess..and keep ur dignity..

yall come with crazy advice..girl zaynab...just go knock on his door and tell his parents that u r carrying his child(put a pillow under ur shirt) and i guarantee u that his u will marry him..

hahahaha how innocent , again I don’t have good relationship with the Sweden ,otherwise I would have been nominated you for noble prize of “ genius girl".

if not..then pay a guy to date u and go the same places that ur ex goes to so u can rub it in his face..if none of this works..then take formula 1..

why to pay ? guys are always ready to date no matter how ugly a gal is hehehe , she can save some money am i right skat?

HP wrote:
Love doesn’t exist , if it exist,it never exist in middle east .Have you ever read any romantic book written by arab author ? they mostly write “ idiot’s guide to suicide bombing “ 101 ways to kill Jewish” Camel racing with kids “ etc etc ,so just leave that arab guy.

cummon HP, lets not start racial comments please, i think you can do much better. and... This is called Dubai forum, if you don't like arabs don't come to their countries and don't talk here.... ( I wonder how moderators do accept such racial comments) beside, yo don't read arabic so don't make assumptions about arabic romantic stories.

Anyway.
Zeinab, just a question, might be stupid, but from what i hear it is long distance relation? am i right???? but anyway, if it is, then don't worry, he is not a perfect person, usually you can think this guys is amazing online, but you actually didn't meet or didn't have day to day interaction to judge on his personality, your relation is just some letters on each others screen... sorry if i made it so abstract.

Cheer up, you already took your decision, but, just don't have in mind that you are not good for him, i can see you were willing to do many sacrifices so you did all you can, he should move the extra mile and do the rest.

So, Have a clear conciounce dumping him.

Cheers and good luck with your life.

yshimy wrote:
cummon HP, lets not start racial comments please, i think you can do much better. and... This is called Dubai forum, if you don't like arabs don't come to their countries and don't talk here.... ( I wonder how moderators do accept such racial comments) beside, yo don't read arabic so don't make assumptions about arabic romantic stories.

Anyway.
Zeinab, just a question, might be stupid, but from what i hear it is long distance relation? am i right???? but anyway, if it is, then don't worry, he is not a perfect person, usually you can think this guys is amazing online, but you actually didn't meet or didn't have day to day interaction to judge on his personality, your relation is just some letters on each others screen... sorry if i made it so abstract.

Cheer up, you already took your decision, but, just don't have in mind that you are not good for him, i can see you were willing to do many sacrifices so you did all you can, he should move the extra mile and do the rest.

So, Have a clear conciounce dumping him.

Cheers and good luck with your life.

Many thanks yshimy
But what has gone on is a bit different compared to what you can guess.

You know, this story is totally ridiculous and I can not understand -- that's very funny.

One thing is undeniable: he LOVES me (he is even in love). So, we are both suffering. He told me somethings that I can not reveal in public but it will remain in my heart all my life.

Let me explain to you my thoughts about it. If a girls tells you: "choose between your family and me ?" What will you do, I don't think you would say "ok, I choose you because I love you". I'm not saying that I told him to make a choice. But in my views if he accepted to marry me that's like he renunce to his family (who is very conservative people).

In addition we was both student and our rooms were not far from each other. So I know him maybe more than his former gf (he stayed a long time with her). Indeed we saw each other mostly everyday.

What I liked from him is his respect for people, his open mind, his practice of Islam, etc. Don't wory he has defects: he is nervous, irritable and macho (a real man so !).

I also want to say to HP that I have always wanted to wear Hijab so that I want to be with a real muslim man

Sorry I made a mistake I wanted to leave a message to D-Unit (see the last sentence of my post) not HP. I think because HP tried to irritate me.

hey zaynab..

zaynab wrote:

I have always wanted to wear Hijab so that I want to be with a real muslim man

what u r saying about wearing the hijab is similar to what im saying..u r doing it for a man..im not trying to judge u..but think about it..u have to do it for your self and not for anybody else.. ..but best of luck hope u get the man of ur dream

ps. about the two branches of islam..i know how u feel..my sister is going through the same shit..and i think that we have to fight for it and not let it be the reason for not approving the marriage..

tutelu

D-Unit wrote:hey zaynab..

zaynab wrote:

I have always wanted to wear Hijab so that I want to be with a real muslim man

what u r saying about wearing the hijab is similar to what im saying..u r doing it for a man..im not trying to judge u..but think about it..u have to do it for your self and not for anybody else.. ..but best of luck hope u get the man of ur dream

ps. about the two branches of islam..i know how u feel..my sister is going through the same shit..and i think that we have to fight for it and not let it be the reason for not approving the marriage..

tutelu

So you agree that it makes no sense. Even some of my friends told me I'm wrong not to give up this relation owing to religion.

As regards the Hijab, I think you don't understand me.
If want to wear that's for God and only for God.


Hope your sister will marry this man and have a lot of childs

I also want to say to HP that I have always wanted to wear Hijab so that I want to be with a real muslim man

I don’t understand the logic behind covering the hairs of head. Scarf should mean to cover all body with proper dress, so that no one can feel sexual attraction toward a female ;0).

Most of muslim girls get scarf in inheritance and use as a family value, it is the same as you put some weight on donkey and donkey walks and walk as long as someone is have Stick in his hand. The stick is family.
When someone wear scarf we conclude that she is practicing Muslim ?

somewhere else you mentioned about having boy friend ,just pondering if boy friend of such kind of relationship exist inside islam? a real muslim doesnt enjoy free trial with different girls before chosing the last

so stop mentioning Islam ,scarf and real muslim in your topic and dont bring more shame on the name of Islam , just chose your own way and be happy

sorry if i hurted u

HP wrote:I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally

You are one ignorant SOB...

HP wrote:I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally

You hate yourself first that' s why you hate everybody
What a pity for you!

HP you shouldent be talking...after all look at ur subject: romance option

and since when did u become an imam telling about how hijab is supposed to be ..

damn what an ignorant!