Ah, the exuberance of youth!
OK, lets do a little 'mammalian attraction' class 101 shall we?
Yes, a female is attracted by certain aspects of a male and, like the animal kingdom, the male is expected to put on a 'display' (Think peacocks, rutting stags, birds of paradise etc etc...) on the understanding that a female will select a male under the following first impression categories:
1. That his display is big enough for the female to believe that he has strong genes to pass on to any offspring
2. That the male is strong enough to protect the female from the advances of any other male
3. The male can provide for the female the things she needs (a nest, security, strong offspring)
In the human instance, this would normally follow a set course based on our now more complex mating dance.
1. Visual attraction - is he hot looking, well dressed (peacock display) and the right V shape (broad shouldered, narrow hipped)
2. Chemical attraction - Both obvious and subliminal (does his smell attract and are those pheromones working!)
3. Mutual Attraction - when she communicates with him, is there a point of common interest or does he bore her
4. Does he follow the complicated set of mating rules we have (he says and does all the right things)
These triggers fire off pysiological reactions in both parties that you can do nothing to control:
1. Increased heart rate
2. A flush to the face and erogenous zones
3. Dilated pupils
4. A surge of adrenaline
5. A rush of blood to the genitalia
6. Increased secretion of pre mating fluids releasing pheromones
In a simplified environment where there are fewer males and females, these natural reactions are easier to identify and react to. In a competitive environment such as a club or bar, they are defined by who is the alpha male and who displays their feathers better. The female will notice but will also be aware of the competition and will be looking around for alternatives. She will sub-consciously be looking for the dominant male. That comes down to a display of confidence.
The first step is therefore to act with confidence.
If you see a girl who fits with your mental map as 'suitable', then don't just hover around waiting to catch her eye...just walk right up and say hi.
Smile.
A smile is the most welcoming first step and shows you are friendly
The next thing is to open the conversation...don't try any cheesy pick up lines! She is bound to have heard them all before!
Compliment her. It shows that you have noticed something that she may have spent time and money specially preparing for this moment (hair, make-up, clothing choice)
Ask questions. Not dumb ones, something that shows you have an interest in her and her life. What does she do? Where is she from? Is she having a good time.
These are basics.
Once the ice has been broken, then you are free to lead the conversation in the direction you like.
The problem is the environment where this takes place. Most clubs have the music pumping so loud she is probably not going to hear what you are saying and you may struggle to hear her replies. However this can work to your advantage!
A loud environment means you have to lean close to her to make yourself understood. Close proximity allows those subliminal pheromones to work best. Your lips in her ear is a very good start!
Throughout all of this, you have sacrified nothing of who you are, not displayed any peacock tendencies and not had to resort to fake gimmicks. If there is any mutual attraction at all (there is no point in trying to push a situation if the basic attraction stimuli are not there, you will just come across as a sleaze ball trying it on) then you are free to press home the advantage and try to cut her from the crowd (this is stepping her outside her comfort zone) and woo her with your personality and wit. Not just the cheap suit and fake Rolex.
If you are serious, it is guaranteed to create a lasting relationship rather than a shallow and false premise. What would you rather have, a really good looking girlfriend who thinks the sun rises and sets in your Calvin Klein boxer shorts and will be as keen as you are for a regular series of liaisons and possibly longer term relationship with a genuine guy, or a girl who sees you in the cold light of day as a fraud and will never talk to you again and possibly reports you to the authorities for stalking her because she wont answer all your pleading texts or calls?
These are hard and fast rules and are only learned through experience and time.
Knight