MEN

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MEN Dec 11, 2005
wana share this email I got!

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are...

Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.


Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit
the
ground first?
A: Who cares?????.....

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!.

Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: I don't know, I've never seen either.

Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business


Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A:! Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions.


Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink...

Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention
of driving.

Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!

Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract


:D :D :D

easternjewel
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Dec 11, 2005
Hahaha Genius! I likey and sad to say very true of most blokes.
Chocoholic
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.. Dec 11, 2005
Easternjewel just lost the Miss Dubaiforums contest.... sad. Very sad.
sa4877
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Re: .. Dec 11, 2005
sa4877 wrote:Easternjewel just lost the Miss Dubaiforums contest.... sad. Very sad.



'sob' ya ... :cry: :sad2:
hey congrats choco, you go girl ! :cheers:
easternjewel
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Dec 11, 2005
What a complete load of B0llocks! hahahahahahahahahahahaha
yorky500
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Dec 11, 2005
hahaha I like it!!
FeiPo
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Dec 11, 2005
Looooooool :lol: ...very,yery funny and yet so true!
Rosie
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Dec 12, 2005
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What a woman says:
"This place is a mess!
C'mon, you and I need to clean,
Your stuff is lying on the floor
and you'll have no clothes to wear
if we don't do laundry right now!"

What a man hears:
"blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON
blah, blah, blah, blah, YOU AND I
blah, blah, blah, blah, ON THE FLOOR
blah, blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES
blah, blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW"

:D
constantine
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Dec 12, 2005
Men are like.......

.....Placemats.
They only show up when there's food on the table.

.....Mascara.
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

.....Bike helmets.
Handy in an emergency, but otherwise they just look silly.

.....Government bonds.
They take so long to mature.

.....Copiers.
You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.

.....Lava lamps.
Fun to look at, but not all that bright.

.....Bank accounts.
Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest.

.....High heels.
They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

.....Curling irons.
They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.

.....Mini skirts.
If you're not careful, they'll creep up your legs.

.....Handguns.
Keep one around long enough, and you're going to want to shoot it.




alright before i get "shot" at by my brothers...posting about women soon!!>.. :twisted:
constantine
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Dec 12, 2005
AAAAHAHAHAHAHAH :lol
Just the type of responce you would expect from a male!!!!
Rosie
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Re: MEN Dec 13, 2005
easternjewel wrote:wana share this email I got!

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are...

Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.


Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit
the
ground first?
A: Who cares?????.....

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!.

Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: I don't know, I've never seen either.

Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business


Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A:! Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions.


Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink...

Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention
of driving.

Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!

Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract


:D :D :D



Shame Shame!!! u underestimate ur 0wn daddy!!!!!! Whoz ur daddy btw? :lol:
sniper420
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Dec 13, 2005
these aint for no daddys, these for Boyfreinds and husbands :twisted:

My dads greatest man for meee.. but hey, my mom has differnt views lol
easternjewel
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Re: MEN Dec 14, 2005
East Now read my Answer ...............i defend the Men

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?

Puppi has long tongue than men ,so puppi serves the purpose nicely :P

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?

Because they always think about Sx and Gals

Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit
the ground first?


We have parachute :P

Q: What did God say after he created man?

God thought there must be gal , who can cook for him :P

Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?


Because we always find interest in other people's business.

Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?

Because he was looking for weapon of mass destruction :P

Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?

Pigs eat their own shit and we have women :P

Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?

for the sake of Internship :P

Q: Why do men like smart women?

because they cant find attraction in ugly faces.
HP
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Dec 14, 2005
easternjewel wrote:these aint for no daddys, these for Boyfreinds and husbands :twisted:

My dads greatest man for meee.. but hey, my mom has differnt views lol


HAHAHA I bet she does
sniper420
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Dec 14, 2005
Gee HP, Didnt take long for that reply.....3 days!!!!
Why did it take the man so long to come back with a reply?give me 3 days and i will get back to you.... :roll:
Rosie
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Dec 14, 2005
well in three days HP was busy deciding gender and atlast decided by rolling a dice..... :lol:
sniper420
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Dec 14, 2005
Aaaaahahahah...you do realise he will make you suffer for that one?
Rosie
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Dec 14, 2005
well I have experience in dealing with gender confused ppl like Liban and HP so it's my left hand job.


oh oh as you are CEO of Irish republic army (IRA) ...................be my Guest :roll:
HP
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Dec 14, 2005
Rosie wrote:Aaaaahahahah...you do realise he will make you suffer for that one?

well I have experience in dealing with gender confused ppl like Liban and HP so it's my left hand job. 8)
sniper420
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Dec 14, 2005
HP, For your information the I.R.A have been demilitarized ! OH OH OH OK? Sniper you must be such a understanding man they are sooo lucky to have a friend like you... :)
Rosie
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Re: MEN Dec 16, 2005
easternjewel wrote:wana share this email I got!

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are...

Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.


Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit
the
ground first?
A: Who cares?????.....

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!.

Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: I don't know, I've never seen either.

Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business


Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A:! Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions.


Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink...

Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention
of driving.

Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!

Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract


:D :D :D




very funny!!! and east, u sure took the hell out of them which is obviously seen by HP's desperate attempt to give some sensible answer which is hopeless
Mayflower
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Dec 17, 2005
First thing that comes to my mind watching the ads saying "I love being a woman" is "how the hell would women know the pleasures of being a man?" physically and mentally men is more robust compared to man. I dont mean superior. You see u women have to go through menstration, PMS, and other problems. Yes yes we men have our problems too like dying for the "mother"land, earning for family and ofcourse breeding women. :lol:

U women wont know the pleasures of being a man but we can for example Liban has changed the gender by injecting hormones and I have seen ex-his mood swings, talking gibberish and other shit. No u women are missing something really guuuuuuuuuuuuuud - Pleasure of being a man! :lol:
sniper420
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Re: MEN Dec 17, 2005
Lol youre right Mayfl. what kind of answer is that:

HP wrote:
Pigs eat their own shit and we have women or

for the sake of Internship


HAHA

sniper420 wrote: First thing that comes to my mind watching the ads saying "I love being a woman" is "how the hell would women know the pleasures of being a man?" physically and mentally men is more robust compared to man. I dont mean superior. You see u women have to go through menstration, PMS, and other problems. Yes yes we men have our problems too like dying for the "mother"land, earning for family and ofcourse breeding women.

U women wont know the pleasures of being a man but we can for example Liban has changed the gender by injecting hormones and I have seen ex-his mood swings, talking gibberish and other shit. No u women are missing something really guuuuuuuuuuuuuud - Pleasure of being a man!


oh and btw sniper , I was thinking of voting ya for the Mr. forums thing, but now I change my mind..! I am a women oriented girl and you put the wrong punch at a wrong time of your career! :lol:

Pregnancy is a privilege* Woman can conceive and experience the joy of motherhood which over weighs all the other 'problems' that you mentioned!

& for guys.. who wants to have hard on’s all the time.. and loose their hair on the head...yet be hairy all over, shaving... and blah blah! :lol:
easternjewel
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Re: MEN Dec 17, 2005
easternjewel wrote:oh and btw sniper , I was thinking of voting ya for the Mr. forums thing,


WHAT!!!! You weren't just gonna automatically vote for me, where is the love EJ?? :lol: :lol: oh this is a painful shot to the ego.
fayz
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Re: MEN Dec 17, 2005
fayz wrote:
easternjewel wrote:oh and btw sniper , I was thinking of voting ya for the Mr. forums thing,


WHAT!!!! You weren't just gonna automatically vote for me, where is the love EJ?? :lol: :lol: oh this is a painful shot to the ego.



ok, you got it! :D
easternjewel
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Dec 18, 2005
hehehehe i'm a shameless shameless man. thank you :)
fayz
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Re: MEN Dec 18, 2005
easternjewel wrote:wana share this email I got!

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are...

Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.


Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit
the
ground first?
A: Who cares?????.....

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!.

Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: I don't know, I've never seen either.

Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business


Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A:! Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions.


Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink...

Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention
of driving.

Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!

Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract


:D :D :D


these remind me of my school days in our teens when the boys n girls used to crack such jokes on each other. it used to be for fun and possibly sometimes to impress someone with our wits.

interesting... if its just for a sake of a hearty laugh...

but ladies who believe this is true and further advocate on ... either have not matured or never had a close male friend ...

try the latter...you may shift your paradigm..
ajoy
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Some Facts about Woman Dec 25, 2005
ajoy wrote:
easternjewel wrote:wana share this email I got!

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are...

Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.


Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit
the
ground first?
A: Who cares?????.....

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!.

Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: I don't know, I've never seen either.

Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business


Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A:! Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions.


Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink...

Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention
of driving.

Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!

Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract


:D :D :D


these remind me of my school days in our teens when the boys n girls used to crack such jokes on each other. it used to be for fun and possibly sometimes to impress someone with our wits.

interesting... if its just for a sake of a hearty laugh...

but ladies who believe this is true and further advocate on ... either have not matured or never had a close male friend ...

try the latter...you may shift your paradigm..


If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman
If you don't, you are not a man
If you praise her, she thinks you are lying
If you don't, you are good for nothing
If you agree to all her likes, you are a wimp
If you don't, you are not understanding
If you visit her often, she thinks it is boring
If you don't, she accuses you of double-crossing
If you are well dressed, she says you are a playboy
If you don't, you are a dull boy
If you are jealous, she says it's bad
If you don't, she thinks you do not love her
If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her
If you don't, she thinks you do not like her
If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait
If she is late, she says that's a girl's way
If you visit another man, you're not putting in "quality time"
If she is visited by another woman, "oh it's natural, we are girls"
If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you are cold
If you kiss her often, she yells that you are taking advantage
If you fail to help her in crossing the street, you lack ethics
If you do, she thinks it's just one of men's tactics for seduction
If you stare at another woman, she accuses you of flirting
If she is stared by other men, she says that they are just admiring
If you talk, she wants you to listen
If you listen, she wants you to talk

In short:

So simple, yet so complex
So weak, yet so powerful
So confusing, yet so desirable
So damning, yet so wonderful...
emadullah
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Dec 25, 2005
so weird, yet so true..

hats off to you...
ajoy
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