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This is the letter I am publishing and hope that someone can help to a poor woman:

Hello! I am married to a UAE national. We met each other in Ukraine, when we were studying at University, there we got marriage. I don't have parents; I am an orphan, who grown up in a state "child house". My husband didn't tell his family that he was married, as he was afraid from them. We got marriage in Islam, In a Kiev mosque; there we got our married certificates. We got children: a boy and a girl. After that my husband sent a videotape to his family, so they could see the children and me. In Ukraine we were living for 8 years and we were so happy! After finishing studying, my husband came back to his home country – to get a job. After a year I joined him together with the children. He has 6 sisters and 1 brother. 4 sisters are living in Dubai, 2 in Qatar, all are married, except one (40 years old, doctor-gynecologist). She, mother-in-law, father-in-law, brother-in-law and our family are living together, under one roof. Every holiday, vacations all sisters are visiting us with all their children. First year was normal. His mother has diabet and I was treating her, massaging her, checking her sugar level – everything as if she was my own mother. I cleaned the house and cooked. If something was wrong – I kept quite. My husband told me not to argue with anyone, if anything – he will talk to them. When I was 6 moths pregnant, it was our 3rd child, the problem began. They start talking to me every day that I am Russian prostitute and could be bought for one dirham for all night, they humiliated and abused me, told me that I have no parents, have no money. They told my husband: "divorce her". They told that I spelled magic on him. They tearing my clothes on me in front of their husbands and telling that I have no shame, my husband defending me and shout to them. When I was in hospital with my 3rd child, nobody came to me. They are treating my children as animals, if something is broken – it will be big problem. His mother, hiding everything from my children under her bed: sweets, fruits, clothes. For her will be better if the fruits will be spoiled, rather than my children eat it. She is telling me all the time that I am taking money from my husband and sending to my family. She and her daughters make scandals with me, all the time. My husband is on work. When he comes, they always telling him that I started first, and that I am putting his mother under heart attack. Husband is shouting on me, doesn't believe me, and asks me to kiss his mother's head. I am doing everything he asks. Otherwise he will not take me and my kids out and will not talk to us. His father is a nice man, but too old. His mother is a head, and his sisters make climate. Recently we have got a 4th baby and the situation became worse: my husband is bad with me. Not taking me out, all the time he is spending with his friends, and my 4 children and I are sitting together in one room. When I am asking him to rent a flat, and live separate, telling him that I can't bear it any longer, he is telling me that we have no money. If I ask anything – the answer is the same – no money. But for himself he bought a 300,000 Dhs car, for himself he is buying luxury clothes, most expensive mobiles, but no money for me or our kids. I want to divorce him – he is not giving me the divorce. I have no money to go to the Court. I don't know my rights. If only someone could tell me. What is the law after divorce? He is threatening me all the time that he is a "big man", that I will be punished if I do anything against him, that I am here alone. But I can't bear his humiliation and humiliation from his family. I can't say a word; I can't buy food my children like. It is hell for me here!!!

This is a terrible situation that you're in. Sadly under Sharia law if you divorce him, he will have sole custody of all the children as is the norm in many arab countries the father automatically gets custody.

IS there nobody you can go home to? If you're really desperate there is a shelter for women in Dubai and they might be able to help you and the children, all their help is confidential and their location is also private.

Man this is a very sh1tty situation, One thing i would do is make sure you document everything. If people are ripping the clothes off your back keep the ripped garments, if people are harming you physically take pics of yourself, keep a daily diary of everything that happens.

I will not even try to pretend i can understand what you are going through but if it comes down to courts every bit of evidence you can gather will help.

My heart goes out to you.

Firstly sister, I ask u to exercise patience which u have already done for far to long, secondly i suggest u find a competent sheikh who will advise u further in this regard.
Just like to point out to chocoholic that ur statement about fathers gaining custody under the Sharia Law is totally incorrect.The Laws regarding divorce r very vast becoz of diff circumstances,but u seem to have a strong enough case against this man already, he is putting u and ur childrens safety at risk.
I do stress again that u shud contact a sheikh asap
wassalaam

Actually it's something that's been well documented recently in the light of problems with women of other nationalities marrying locals, in that if something goes wrong, the women feels trapped as until a certain age the fathers can have custody of the kids. Saria or not, it happens in this country, look at the recent story of the UK woman who came to take her son back, because the father refused to let her see him or visit her in the UK and the law favoured him and locked her up when she tried to come take the boy home! Whereas in many other countries the law will favour the mother a sole guardian. But it shouldn't matter.

This lady if she is being abused should also go to a hospital and get a doctors report of the injuries being caused to help build a file against the husband and family. If this is happening to the children too, it's abuse and neglect and needs to be taken very seriously. Normally you contact an authority like the social services, but I doubt there's anything like that in the UAE.

The police will be virtually useless, you need a humanitarian organisation and a lawyer to get away from these awful people.

Patience is not enough, if you were being abused in this manner would you stick around and watch your children be hurt and yourself? How long before something serious happens?

First of all sister, I believe you are going in a very hard time.

2nd, in Islam the wife could ask for a separate house for her self and her family away from the other families. This even could be guaranteed by the laws of Islam … I don’t know how they deal with this here in Dubai.

3rd dont be afraid of the custody of your kids, there is nothing in Islam says that the kids have to be with their father, its mostly with their mother.. At least that what I came across in most of the cases in the court specially if the kids r still young.

4th in Islam if someone has claimed that someone has committed adultery without four witnesses … yes they have to be four …. Other wise the accuser has to be punished with 80 lashes in front of the public regardless who he/she was. So, if they accused you by saying you are a prostitute tell them that, and threaten them that you would sue them if they didn’t stop.

4th, if you are thinking of divorce and you are afraid that you will be thrown in the street, don’t be. Islam guarantees that the divorced lady should have a fair percentage from her ex-husband’s income and her kids too. And I am sure that laws here in UAE works accordingly when it comes to this point.

What those people are doing you is so bad… if there is a true Islamic law.. they will be screwed.

When I am writing this, I remembered a story that the profit mentioned about a lady who was sent to hell because she had a cat which she blocked in a room and never feed it, so the cat died. The profit said that she went to hill.

And another woman who was a prostitute – yes a prostitute – who saw a dog in the desert so theirsty, she tied her shoe to a rope and sent it down in a well to bring water for the thirsty dog. She was sent to heavens because of that.

So, how it would be when it comes to humans, Allah would forgive WHATEVER the person would do, unless he/she did bad to someone, this someone has to forgive first so that person has to be forgiven.

Sister … don’t be afraid…. There is a day for the unfair people which would come… sooner or later.

feeling very bad welling up after reading ur story, i can't help in any way except praying God to be with you. if God gets you to it, he will sure get you through it.

Very well said Intimacy!

Fa sabrun jameelun ( patience is beautiful)
In whatever situation carry on exercising patience as well as take action, because the reality is that this is usually a lengthy process, as i myself have been through it and alhamdulillah i have full custody of my son, so do not despair and we will carry on making dua for u.

and chocoholic i think its better that u leave the advice to the islamic sholars or people who r well into Islam.

Larissa20 wrote:This is the letter I am publishing and hope that someone can help to a poor woman:

. But for himself he bought a 300,000 Dhs car, for himself he is buying luxury clothes, most expensive mobiles, but no money for me or our kids. I want to divorce him – he is not giving me the divorce.

300,000 dhs car and no money! So bad! My advice is get a good job and look out for child day care. After that move out or leave for Ukraine. If you have friends, ask em to secretly arrange for your travel abroad or take refuge in their house and sue ur husband! I understand it can be difficult for a single mom with 4 children.

sniper420 wrote:300,000 dhs car and no money! So bad! My advice is get a good job and look out for child day care. After that move out or leave for Ukraine. If you have friends, ask em to secretly arrange for your travel abroad or take refuge in their house and sue ur husband! I understand it can be difficult for a single mom with 4 children.

Seems like a simple decision, BUT!!!
She never left the house, without her husband accompanying her, and even that happens rarely!!!
He doesn't want her to work, he doesn't even let her walk to a grocery store!!!
She is a friend of mine, and I'm writing instead of her, because her English is not that well.
A few days ago his mother died, and now this poor woman afraid to leave her room, because her husband told her not to.
Everyone is blaming her for their mother's death, including her husband!!!
He also said if anyone abuses her physically or verbally, not to respond, or else she'll be beaten by him later!!!!!!!!!
Despite of all event, she doesn't have courage to make a move, even though I tell her every day that no one can help her, but herself!!!

Might sounds crazy, but with no solution in hand, it might work.

Why not send a letter to Sheikh Mohamed, or his wife or daughter or any influantial person in the country. I hear they can help and interfer if you are lucky enough.


Don't know, might sound crazy, might sound bad, but i'm trying to help.

The other solution i might think of, go to your embassy or call them and try to arrange to go back home, you may also take the children, it happens alot in Egypt, don't know how it goes here. If the children can't come, sadly i would say, leave them here and come when you are in a better position or let friends of you here keep you in touch with them.

Don't know, i'm very sad and really try to help even with lousy solutions.

God be with you.

Only teh embassy can be of any help to u...contact teh embassy at the earliest.. Larissa... if u know teh person and her address approach teh embassy on her behalf.

I wish i cud be of help

A new service for Dubai government, she has only to call a free number or to send an email to the new service " Alameen"

please go to this link to find the details

http://www.dubai.ae/portal/en.portal?da ... Label=view

hope it will work

through which the public can assist and communicate any information related to security matters to law enforcement personnel

Al Ameen is not the service she should be contacting. This is more of a social worker case not security case. I think the ideas of contacting the embassy or some sort of woman's rights group/shelter is a better idea.

just my two fils ..

This is more of a social worker case not security case. I think the ideas of contacting the embassy or some sort of woman's rights group/shelter is a better idea.

just my two fils ..

i believe it goes beyond that,

( As an indication of its success Alameen in its first year received 1178 calls of which 107 traffic information, 87 prostitution reports, 30 fraud, 28 illegal immigrants and workers, 20 drug, 15 begging, 12 harassments, 7 witchcraft, 5 money laundering in addition to various suggestions.)

if she calls.. she has nothing to lose.

4 calls a day is considered success? In this environment?

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vip protection wrote:Protection 24h/24 for VIPs including close-up bodyguard protection.
Bodyguards with profession credentials.
Security guarding and interventions.
Services for VIP (organisation of trip, travel and itinerary).
Rent prestigious villas (securisation by intervention groups).
investigation
http://www.issgroups.com

oh god damn she needs legal advice not any hit man to smack her husband.